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Draft Version for Pilot Studies
Sex, Faith, Fear and Living:
Towards Celebrating Our
Sexuality
— A 10 session workshop developed for use in small groups —
— by a team of people in the Anglican Diocese of Johannesburg —
The Facilitator’
«p-
Facilitator’s Guide
Facilitator’s Introduction
Introducing the course
Length
Each session has been designed to run for nine sessions of between 90-120 minutes.
As this is a pilot we would ask you to monitor the time very carefully. It is quite
possible that sessions as they now stand will vaiy in length. We would like
suggestions as to how to standardise the length.
We think that the course could be done over a weekend or two.
Orientation
This workshop has a specific orientation. We approach the question of human
sexuality from a principally pastoral perspective that seeks to be affirming and
inclusive of the variety of human sexuality rather than attempting to find a simple
“right or wrong” solution. It may be helpful to read the following paragraph to the
group.
The intention of this course is to explore and learn from each other, rather than to
legislate what should be. In this way we seek to follow the model Jesus provided
rather than be the model that Moses gave. Mosesfirst handed down the law, or made
a point or pronouncement, which often resulted in resistance and hostility from his
hearers. Jesus did things differently. He sought to get people to make up their own
minds and to take responsibility for their own lives. Jesus very often first asked a
question, and after some discussion, offered a parable or a statement. We will try to
use Jesus’s method throughout this course. (Ifyou need to, back this up with reference
to Matthew 12:27. 15:4, 16:13, 22:21, John 8:7, Luke 2:49.)
Ground rules for enabling caring dialogue
►
These sessions are confidential. We are free to discuss our own comments or
feelings with people who are not part of this group, but not those of any person
in this group
►
In this group we discuss issues but we do not name persons
►
We give equal t:
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Facilitator's Introduction
Page 3
A note to facilitators of pilot groups
First a big thank you agreeing to pilot this Human Sexuality Course for us.
This is what we would like you to do for us.
1.
Carefully read through the WHOLE workshop before you begin
If you have any questions contact one of the following people asap:
- Douglas Ton
614-2124 (h) 336-8725(w)
djtorr@cpsanet.co.za
- Julia Denny-Dimitriou
788-4322 (h/w)
rev2d2@iafrica.com
- Paul Germond
837-9895 (h) 716-8477 (w) 044mond@muse.wits.ac.za
Feel free to contact us at any point in the workshop.
2.
Please try to have a co-facilitator. Two people evaluating a project like this will be of
great benefit to us.
3.
Please be sure to fill in the evaluation forms that you will find at the end of each
session as soon after the session as possible.
4.
Send the nine evaluation sheets to us as soon as possible after you have completed the
workshop.
5.
Please make the participants aware that the workshop is being piloted. Arrange a time
in the final session for them to give feedback by filling in the evaluation sheet at the
end of session nine.
6.
Be aware that this is an intensely pastoral project. It might very well bring up serious
emotional traumas or other difficulties among the participants. It is critically
important that you create a list of resource people and groups (eg. Anglicare or
FAMSA) that is available to all members of the group.
7.
We are convinced that if you as a facilitator are prepared to be vulnerable and share of
yourself, the workshop experience will be immeasurably enhanced for the
participants.
8.
It is possible that we might have overlooked some very important aspect of the
process, both in terms of content and of group dynamic. It might be, as an example of
the latter, that we have not handled the ending of each session very well. Please don’t
simply rely on what we have done. If there is a gap fill it and let us know about it and
how you solved it.
I ILL
Facilitator’s Introduction
Page 2
everybody attends all the sessions. Clearly, in some case, some participants will
simply not be able to come. But because of the sensitive nature of the material and the
aims of building a group culture of care and respect, it is critical that people commit to
the to the whole course.
Role of the Facilitator in the Group
►
suggests the purpose for the discussion. You are the facilitator. People will
look to you for the purpose of the group. This is your group. Not ours. You
and the group aim it.
►
gatekeeper — makes sure that all participants are heard. Draws silent ones
into the discussion; prevents domination by any one person.
►
remains as neutral as possible in order to make sure that differing views are
heard, and all contributions considered.
►
timekeeper - keeps the discussion on track and on time..
Hints for good discussion groups
►
arrange the chairs in a circle
►
get to know the members of your group
►
be friendly with all the members of the group
►
ask questions that are open ended. Don’t ask questions that can be answered
with a “Yes” or a “No”
►
Don’t dominate the discussion yourself. You are not the teacher, but the
facilitator
►
Check for clarity, that everyone understands what is going on.
Instructions to the Facilitator
The Facilitator’s Manual which you are now reading is identical to the Participant’s
Manual in all respects except for the guidelines which are given to the Facilitator in
italics. Everything that is in italics is unique to this manual and is there to give you
guidance.
- 5Facilitator’s Guide
- Session 1-
Starting the Journey:
Talking about Sex
Our aim in this session is:
►
to ovendew the course
►
to get to know each other
►
to look at the language of sexuality
Prayer:
Today we are confronted with our bodies. Today we find that humanity and sexuality
are inseparable. Today we see that in Jesus Christ, God become human, the divine
and the body are inseparable. Today we find that in Christ our sexuality is affirmed
not denied. Today we begin our journey of discovery. Today, loving God, we ask for
your guidance and continued presence now and in the weeks that lie ahead. Amen.
Introduction:
To start we will ask three simple questions.
►
Who are we?
►
What are we going to be doing in this workshop?
►
How are we going to proceed?
Who are we?
Congratulations! You have been brave enough to tackle the often controversial and sometimes
difficult topic of sexuality. You won’t be doing it alone! You’ll be doing it as a group. So
let’s start by getting to know each other.
Activity
Tell us your name and who you are.
Why are you here and what do you expect from this series?
Tell us two of your nicknames, one you like as well as one you don't
like and why you like or dislike them.
What will we be doing?
Now that we’ve got to know each other a little better, let us explore the contents of the
workshops. This series is designed to help us explore the human experience of sexuality and
how it relates to our faith. We are all sexual beings. We are all people of faith. So often the
meeting of faith and sexuality never occurs. Both church and society overwhelmingly teach us
that the two have nothing to do with each other. They are in fact to be kept apart. Sex and
sexuality are also not talked about very much in the family, let alone the church context. But
this is what we are about to do. It is important to think about how previous understandings of
Session 1: Starting the Journey
Page 2
sex and sexuality have shaped our present understanding. The way we think about sex and
sexuality today will shape our understanding in the future. So in the words of a contemporary
song writer,
’’Lets talk about sex, Baby!”
However, before we do so, let's about how we will do this. The series has a total of nine
sessions of 1 A to 2 hours each, each dedicated to a particular topic. The nine topics are:
Session 1:
Session 2:
Session 3:
Session 4:
Session 5:
Session 6:
Session 7:
Session 8:
Session 9:
Starting the Journey: Talking About Sex
An overview and introduction to the course and the group
Learning about Sex
We examine what we’ve learnt about sexuality from church,
family, and friends and how we’ve learnt it
Back to Basics: The ABC of reading the Bible
We explore the different ways we read the Bible
Reading about Sex: The Birds and the Bees and the Bible
We will read the which Song of Songs provides an amazing
celebration of human sexuality
Sexy Singles
We explore single peoples’ experience of sexuality
Sexuality in Heterosexual Perspective
We explore heterosexual peoples’ experience of sexuality
Sexuality in Homosexual Perspective
We explore the experience of sexuality between people of the same sex
The Texts Speak! Or do they? Homosexuality and the Bible
We examine what the Bible says about sexuality
The Naked Prayer: Celebrating Sexuality
A service of worship celebrating our sexuality
How will we do all this?
We'll do it in a small group. In this way we can meet and talk with each other and discover
ways in which our faith and sexuality can be expressed in a healthy way. We will also learn
from each others experiences, support each other, and learn to care for each other. We will
grow in Christian community. We will do it with respect for each other. To help us talk and
understand one another better it may be useful to look as the difference between dialogue and
debate.
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Dialogue
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Debate
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■ To be in diaoiogue, each person must be willing • ! In contrast, to be in debate, means people:
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grow in understanding of self and others
take responsibility for one’s own
thoughts, feelings and experiences
listen to others as they try and express
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try to prove each other wrong
defend personal assumptions as truth
try to win each argument
assume that there is only one right
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- 7Page 3
Session 1: Starting the Journey
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accept others’ experiences, thoughts and I I
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feelings as true for them
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search for strengths, not weaknesses, in
the other’s position
___________________________________
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try,to
find areas of basic agreement
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accept that some questions have no easy •
answers
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accept that it can be good to be silent and |
13
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allow
others to do the same.
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search for weaknesses in the other’s
position
search for big differences
look for one final answer
use silence as_a weapon_________
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Be sure to have everybody accept this as the basis for the group. Elaborate here on the
Ground Rules suggested in the introduction. You may want to get the group to sign a
covenant of respect, confidentiality, and agreement to attend all the sessions. You could do
this a the beginning ofSession 2.
Language and Terminology
Gabriel Moran, a philosopher, once said:
Whoever owns the words owns the world. If the words are not available to
ask the right questions, then no new answers are possible, society as a whole
and institutions within society prevent certain kinds of change by not allowing
for the language that would be necessary to raise questions of that kind of
change.
__
Language is not innocent. A person's choice of language is a moral, political, and theological
act with personal and societal implications and consequences.
Activity
On a piece of paper write down any reactions you have when you hear
the word "sex." Share some of them with the group.
The point of this exercise is to show that there are many different reactions to the word “sex.
Defining the words we use to speak about sex
We need to be clear about the meaning of the words we use when we talk, especially when we
are dealing with sensitive issues. Words carry values and can be hurtful and destructive. The
words we choose to use reveal a great deal about what we and our society think about any
given subject. We need to start to think carefully about the language we use when we deal
with our own and other’s sexuality.
Activity
Below is a list of words. Break into pairs. Each pair will be
allocated 2-3 words from the list. Come up with a simple
definition of the words. Write them down. You'll share them
Page 4
Session I: Starting the Journey
with the group. Try and find a meaning to each word that the
group can agree on. Try and avoid using value judgements in
your definitions. These words and their definitions will be used
by the group as a common language to talk about sexuality.
List of words:
Sexuality
1.
Sex
2.
Sexual orientation
3.
Homosexual
4.
Bisexual
5.
Asexual
6.
Celibacy
7.
Promiscuity
8.
Prostitute
9.
Transvestite
10.
11.
12.
13.
14.
15.
16.
17.
18.
19.
20.
Transsexual
Masturbation
Polygamy
Marriage
Family
Homophobia
Sexism
Sin
Oral sex
Non-penetrative sex
Let’s end with a time for personal reflection
Activity
We take a minute or two to be quiet. Now let us think about the session
which we have just experienced together. Here are some questions to
help guide your thoughts:
►
What do I expect to get out of this workshop?
►
What am I prepared to contribute to these workshops ?
Please write down your responses and think prayerfully about them
over the week as we will be sharing our expectations next session.
As we look to the rest of the course we must realise that talking about sex and sexuality can be
a very delicate thing. Some of us may find things in some of the sessions very difficult. They
may raise painful memories and experiences, or they may touch on something in our lives at
the moment which needs healing and hope. This course is designed not just for growth and
learning, but also to help us along the path of healing. If something does come up that
requires attention please deal with it. Speak to the Facilitator of the group, or with the group
as a whole or individuals. Some of us might want skilled counselling. The Facilitator will
hand out a list of resources that you could use.
The group must commit itself to being with participants who are in pain. If someone starts to
cry, or cannot talk, be gentle and loving. Listen if a person needs to speak, but if they don’t
need to speak, simply sit quietly with them. You might pray together. Never let the outline of
a particular session dictate what should happen. This course is there for you. It is yours.
Hand out a list of resources that people may refer to if they experience any difficulty during
the course.
-V
Session 1: Starting the Journey
Page 5
Prayer:
God you have given us words as a gift to speak to each other. The scriptures tell us that
words can either build up or they can destroy. We ask you to help us to think about the
meaning of the words we use in describing our sexuality and that of others. Help be
aware of the way we use words. May the words from our mouths and the thoughts of
our hearts be acceptable to you and be loving and considerate to the others in the
group. We ask this in Jesus’ name. Amen.
Who wrote this course?
We want to say at the outset that this workshop was put together by a group of people who
shared a common understanding of human sexuality. While we do not agree on every issue,
we do share a common point of departure about human sexuality. Clearly this perspective,
this common understanding is going to come out in the pages that follow. We are not neutral;
neither is this workshop entirely neutral. But we believe that it is fair and that it will
encourage you to embark on a journey of discovery which will not be overwhelmed by our
perspective. Our understanding of human sexuality is one of many possible understandings,
but one we believe to be fully Christian, and one we believe the church needs to take very
seriously. So we offer this course to you in the hope that it will allow you to explore the area
of human sexuality in a new way and allow you to develop a relevant and deeply personal
understanding of what it means to be human, sexual and Christian.
The people who participated in constructing this workshop were all living in Johannesburg at
the time and members of the Anglican Diocese of Johannesburg. They are:
Godfrey Henwood
Douglas Torr
Julia Denny-Dimitriou
Bart Cox
Paul Germond
Shirley Moulder
Linda Schwartz
, Cynthia Botha
Rector of St. Thomas Church, Linden, Johannesburg
Former Dean of St. Mary’s Cathedral, Johannesburg
Social Responsibility Coordinator of the Diocese of
Johannesburg and Anglican Priest
Freelance Journalist and Self-Supporting Anglican Deacon
Development Consultant specializing in HIV/Aids work
Head of the Department of Religious Studies, Wits University
and Anglican Priest
Development Consultant
Anglican Priest and Chaplain to the Diocesan School for Girls,
Grahamstown
Secretary to the Anglican Publishing House, and SelfSupporting Anglican Priest
Facilitator’s Guide
- Session 2 -
We-ve,:Learnt abow SEX ■
From Family, Church, and Friends
Our aim in this session is:
►
to think about how we learnt about sex and our sexuality
►
to discover what we feel about sexuality
Tell the group that we will not begin this session with a prayer as we will do a prayer
exercise later in the session.
Activity
In the group, talk about some of your expectations for this course that
you thought about last week.
Be sure to collect the expectations that people have written down. You might very well want
to use them to prepare for the last session, the worship session. Participants may well want
to reflect on what they have learnt from this course and being able to read what their
expectation were at the beginning of the course at the end will help in this process.
Communicate this to the group.
The words we use ...
Move straight into this activity. Divide the group into two groups. Tell participants to find
their partner: the person whose word most closely corresponds to the word on their hack.
They may only ask questions that receive “Yes” or “No” answers; and when asked.questions
they may only give “Yes ” or “No ” answers.
Activity
The facilitator will stick a label on your back without you seeing it. It
will make you one of a pair of words that are to do with sexuality. You
have to find your partner -- the person whose word matches yours.
You can do this by asking questions that can only have "Yes" or "No"
as answers. You can only give "Yes" or "No" answers to questions
you are asked.
These are pairs of words that you can use:
Masturbate
Wank /Trek Draad
Penis
Dick/Piel
Ejaculate
Cum/
Breasts
Boobs/Tits
Vagina
Pussy/Vis/Poes
Testicles
Balls/Nuts
II
Session 2: What We ’ve Learnt About Sex
Facilitators Guide
Page 2
Come up with appropriate words for the group you are working with ifthese are not. Slang
is usually contextually specific.
4
,
Use diagram of the reproductive organs?
You might also get a diagram of the male andfemale reproductive organs (ofhumans that is)
and get the group to fill in the appropriate names for the organs.
Focussing on Our Bodies
Activity — Using Your Imagination
The facilitator will now take the group through a reflective imaginative
exercise.
Tell participants: If this exercise is not to your liking, sit still andfocus on something else so
as to allow others to participate. Now lead them in this exercise. We would suggest that you
ask them to close their eyes. This will help participants to concentrate on the exercise, and
also not worry about looking stupid. This exercise should not be rushed - take your time and
allow participants to enter fully into the exercise. Read the following aloud to the goup
slowly and reflectively, pausing often.
Meditative Activity
This is a Centring exercise - in which we will focus on different parts of anatomy.
Think of your Feet, what they look like. Touch them, how do theyfeel? Now continue to
focus on your body and move up your body to your Calves. Are they hard or soft, what
sensations do you have from them? Follow your legs to your Knees. How are they shaped,
feel them, are they bony, or perhaps smooth? Continue to moves along your body to your
Thighs, what sensations do you experience here? Now focus on your Bottom as you are
seated on the floor or the chair? What does it feel like to be seated on top ofa surface?
Continue to move up your body. Become aware ofyour Arms and the hair or pores in your
arms. Move right down to your Hands, feel each Finger, feel the sensations in your Palms.
Now move back up and experience the sensations in your Shoulders. Are they tense or
relaxed and comfortable? Finally feel your Neck and end with your Face and Hair.
Still in a prayerful mood ask the group to think about the following questions. Allow for a
long pause between each question. Think back to childhood:
When were you first aware ofyour body?
When were you first aware of other peoples' bodies?
When were you first aware ofyour sexuality?
What was your first sexual experience? e.g. a thought, holding hands, kiss,
menstruation, masturbation.
How did that first experience make you feel?
How do you feel now when you remember that experience?
Now slowly open your eyes and become aware ofyour surroundings and the other
people in the room.
11
Session 2: What We’ve Learnt About Sex
Facilitators Guide
Page 3
Avril learns about sex
The aim of this exercise is simply to give the participants an example to make more concrete
the questions that we asked participants to reflect back on when thinking about their
childhood and early experiences of the body and sexuality.
Avril is 11 and lives with her Mother and Father and two brothers. Apart
from having two brothers she is very happy at home. She is also very happy
at school where she sings in the choir and plays lots of sport, especially tennis.
However, there is something about which she is not happy and that is her
body. She has noticed that it is starting to do strange things. Her nipples are
beginning to swell and there is hair growing in her armpits. Avril would
quite like to ask her mother about it, but she feels too shy.
One day, when she gets home from school, she finds a book next to her bed.
It is called "Suzy's Babies" and it's about a hamster called Suzy who mates
with another hamster called Sam and has babies. Avril gets the feeling that
her mother put the book there on purpose, but she is not sure why and she is
still unhappy about the strange things her body is doing.
Activity
Now that you’ve read about how Avril learnt about sex, spend a few moments
think about these questions on your own, then discuss as much as you feel
comfortable with one other person.
k
Who first told you about sex?
►
if you read anything about sexuality and sex what sort of things were
►
they?
your
What were some of the things that the Church taught you about
I
sexuality and sex?
►
What are some of the ways in which what you learned in the past affect
what you think about sex today?
►
What are some of the ways that what you learned about sex th.en affect
how you feel about it today?
►
Has this exercise raised any difficulties for you ? if so, be sure to talk to
someone.
Pressing our buttons: when sex gets uncomfortable
Mary Anne Coates writes:
Why do we feel uncomfortable about certain things we do and think? Most of
us will know and name this feeling as one of GUILT. Is it because it offends
our own ideal of ourselves and the "nice" picture we have built up of
ourselves, or is it because it offends other people to the extent that they may
13
Session 2: What We’ve Learnt About Sex
Facilitators Guide
Page 4
turn around and act against us?
Make sure that participants understand the quote from Coates, then in the group discuss
which of the three scenes below makes individuals feel most uncomfortable, and which makes
them least uncomfortable, and encourage them to share some ofthe reasons for these
reactions. Allow each person to share their own response to at least two of the situations.
Three scenes:
►
You see two women embrace in a doorway and kiss each other
►
Entering the home of friends through the back door, you find them making love on the
lounge floor
►
Sitting on the top deck of a bus, you can see into a second storey flat where you see a
naked man
Activity
Think about what Mary Coates says, th<en in the group discuss the three
situations below asking these questions:
►
which one makes you most uncomfortable?
►
k
which are you most comfortable with?
share some of the reasons for your feelings
Closing
Prayer
Make sure that have a Bible handy with Psalm 139 book marked.
Stand in a circle, hold hands, and have someone read Psalm 139:1,2 13-16 aloud.
Take few minutes to reflect on what you have leamed/experienced in this session and
share it with God. Pray out aloud if you would like to. Be sensitive to any person
who might be showing signs of discomfort. Care gently for them.
Homework
Bring something to the next session which represents what you have felt, learned or
experienced in this session.
Facilitator’s Guide
- Session 3 -
The ABC of Reading the Bible
Our aim in this session is:
►
to discover how in the process of reading we interpret the text
►
to deal with some problems connected with the interpretation of Scripture
►
to see that we all read Scripture from our own life situation and that there is seldom
one common to every reader
Prayer
Creator God, you are our guide and our strength. We know the love you have for your
people. We know it through their stories in Scripture and because of the ways in
which you have worked in our own lives. We ask that you continue to guide us as we
search your word for answers to our questions. Let us hear your voice speaking to us,
and give us grace to understand what you want us to do. We ask this in Jesus' name.
Amen.
Besure to bring a bible and a candle to this session.
Activity
Place the objects you have brought with you on a table next to the BibLe and
candle, if you want to sh..are with the rest of the group why you have brought
this particular object.
Interpreting three Old Testament texts
The purpose ofgetting participants to discuss these texts is that they can have some fun and
also realise that not all scripture texts can be applied to our lives today. Allow them to
struggle to make the texts meaningful, and don't reveal the purpose until they have struggled
with all the texts.
In groups of about 4 read the following 3 texts.
Exodus 21:15,17
2115Whoever hits father or mother shall be put to death.
2116Whoever curses father or mother shall be put to death.
Leviticus 13:29-37
13:29When a man or woman has a sore on the head or chin, ^the priest shall
examine it. If it seems to be deeper than the surrounding skin and the hairs in
it are yellowish and thin, it is a dreaded skin disease, and he shall pronounce
the person unclean. 31If, when the priest examines it, the sore does not appear
to be deeper than the surrounding skin, but there are still no healthy hairs in
it, he shall isolate the person for seven days. 32The priest shall examine the
Session 3: The ABC ofReading the Bible
Facilitator’s Guide
Page 2
sore again on the seventh day, and if it has not spread and there are no
yellowish hairs in it and it does not seem to be deeper than the surrounding
skin, 33the person shall shave the area around the sore. The priest shall then
isolate the person for another seven days. ^On the seventh day the priest
shall again examine the sore, and if it has not spread and does not seem to be
deeper than the surrounding skin, he shall pronounce the person ritually
clean. The person shall wash his clothes, and he shall be clean. 35But if the
sore spreads after he has been pronounced clean, %the priest shall examine
him again. If the sore has spread, he need not look for yellowish hairs; the
person is obviously unclean. 37But if in the priest's opinion the sore has not
spread and healthy hairs are growing in it, the sore has healed, and the priest
shall pronounce him ritually clean.
Deuteronomy 25:5-10
5If two brothers live on the same property and one of them dies, leaving no
son, then his widow is not to be married to someone outside the family; it is
the duty of the dead man's brother to marry her. ^he first son that they have
will be considered the son of the dead man, so that his family line will
continue in Israel. 7But if the dead man's brother does not want to marry her,
she is to go before the town leaders and say
"My husband's brother will not do his duty; he refuses to give his brother a
descendant among the people of Israel." ^hen the town leaders are to
summon him. If the brother still refuses to marry her, 9then his brother's
widow is to go up to him in the presence of the town leaders, take one of his
sandals, spit in his face, and say, "This is what happens to the man who
refuses to give his brother a descendant." 10His family will be known in Israel
as "the family of the man who had his sandal pulled off."
Interpreting these 3 texts:
Break up into three groups and ask the following questions:
k
What do these three texts mean?
►
How can we apply them to our lives today?
Interpreting a Picture
The facilitator will show the group a picture. Write or think of a story that
might explain this picture anJ then tell your story to the group.
You can use just about any picture for this exercise. Choose one that is clearly ambiguous
and can be read in a variety ofways. Ifyou what to choose one that is sexually ambiguous.
Show the participants the picture and tell them to look carefully at it. Then tell them to write
the story, or if they are not comfortable with writing to think of it in their minds and then to
tell it to the group. Participants must be given plenty of time for this exercise.
Once participants have told the story point out just how many different accounts of the same
picture there are. You could also use the example ofa traffic accident and how different
witnesses see the event differently. In the same way as we see things differently, so that no
j
16
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Session 3: The ABC of Reading the Bible
Facilitator’s Guide
Page 3
two people are able to describe the same event in the same way. This is also true of what we
read. Now go on to the next section that explains this point in more detail. Either read it out
yourself or have one of the participants read it out aloud.
How to understand what the Bible has to say to us today
Activity
You may by now have realised that the way in which we interpret pictures and
even biblical texts is different for each person. Think about hilow the way you
interpreted the three biblical texts and the picture was infl uenced by your sex,
age, culture, economic position, education, previous knowledge, life experience
and whether you are married, single, widowed or div:
ivorced.
►
Share your thoughts with the group.
If any of these facts were important for you in deciding how to read the text, then you will
have some understanding of the facts which influenced the original writers of biblical texts.
Our task is to be guided by the Holy Spirit to use our hearts, intelligence, learning and
experience to hear and find out what is God's Word for us today.
Here are some questions we can ask to help us in interpreting the text:
►
What kind of writing / literature is the passage that I am reading (law, history, poetry,
letter, gospel, parable, miracle story, prophecy of the future) ?
►
Who was this passage originally written for, and how would they have understood its
meaning?
►
Is our situation different from the one in the passage?
►
What can we learn from the passage?
Check that the group understand what they have read before doing the next exercise.
Reading more texts
The purpose ofthis exercise is for participants to see that if the church can change its mind
on these texts then it can do so with others as well. Up until the early seventies, on a the
basis of a very literal interpretation of these texts the church did not allow divorcees to
remarry, nor could they be ordained, and if a clergyperson got divorced they had their
licences withdrawn. For pastoral reasons, such as the reality ofabusive relationships, and
the fact that society no longer attaches the same stigma to divorce that it once did, the church
changed its original position that divorce was unacceptable. The position now is that whilst
divorce is not seen as something that is to be encouraged, and life-long commitment to
marriage vows is the ideal, divorce is accepted. Divorcees may remarry in church after an
interview and the bishop grants permission for this to happen. Divorced persons may also be
ordained, and an ordained clergyperson who divorces his/her partner no longer has his/her
licence withdrawn, and he/she may also remarry. You may when explaining this situation to
participants after they have done the exercise by reading out the section in the Anglican
Prayerbook [pages 484-485]dealing with the remarriage ofdivorcees. Only explain all this
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Session 3: The ABC ofReading the Bible
Facilitator’s Guide
Page 4
to participants after they have themselves struggled with the texts and answeredfor them
selves the questions that are part of this exercise.
As a group read these two texts aloud.
Matthew 19:3-9
^me Pharisees came to him and tried to trap him by asking, "Does our law
allow a man to divorce his wife for whatever reason he wishes?" 4Jesus
answered, "Haven't you read the scripture that says that in the beginning the
Creator 'made them male and female?' 5and said, 'For this reason a man will
leave his father and mother and unite with his wife, and the two will become
one.' ^So they are no longer two, but one. Man must not separate, then, what
God has joined together." 7The Pharisees asked him, "Why then did Moses
give the law for a man to hand his wife a divorce notice and send her away?"
8Jesus answered, "Moses gave you permission to divorce your wives because
you are so hard to teach. But it was not like that at the time of creation. 9I tell
you, then; that any man who divorces his wife, even though she has not been
unfaithful, commits adultery if he marries some other woman."
Mark 10:2-12
^ome Pharisees came to him and tried to trap him. "Tell us," they asked,
"does our Law allow a man to divorce his wife?" 3Jesus answered with a
question, "What law did Moses give to you?" 4Their answer was, "Moses
gave permission for a man to write a divorce notice and send his wife away.
5Jesus said to them, "Moses wrote this law for you because you are so hard to
teach. 6But in the beginning, at the time of creation, zGod made them male
and female', as the scripture says. 7/And for this reason a man will leave his
father and mother and unite with his wife, 8and the two will become one
flesh.' So they are no longer two but one flesh. 9One must not separate, then,
what God has put together."
10When they went back into the house, the disciples asked Jesus about
this matter. nHe said to them, "A man must who divorces his wife and
marries another woman commits adultery against his wife. 12In the same
way, a woman who divorces her husband and marries another man commits
adultery."
Interpreting the texts
Remembering the factors which influenced the way you read the earlier texts
and also the questions which we can ask to help us interpret texts, answer the
following questions:
What does this text mean?
What relevance does this text have for your life now?
What do you agree with in this text?
►
What do you disagree with?
►
What is the Church's stand on divorce and remarriage today?
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Session 3: The ABC of Reading the Bible
Facilitator’s Guide
Page 5
Evaluation
How would you sum up what you've learnt? Use these characters to speak on your behalf ???
This a fun exercise and participants might want to share their evaluations with one another
in the large group.
For Next Session
Read the translation of the Song of Songs.
For this session ask all participants to read the Song ofSongs. Explain to them that this is
very important as the whole of the next session willfocus on the reading of this text. If
possible we suggest you follow the suggestion in session five and as a group divide the parts
between yourselves and read them together when you meetfor session five.
iq
Facilitator’s Guide
- Session 4 -
Reading about Sex:
The Birds and the Bees
Our aim in this session is:
to read a particular text from the bible - the Song of Songs.
1.
to read it aloud. We suggest that if possible it is read like a play, with different people
2.
reading different parts.
to discover a biblical text in which human sexuality is celebrated.
3.
to reflect on our responses to this text and it being read aloud in a group.
4.
Prayer:
Creator God, we come before you aware of the wonder of our lives. Thank you for
your love that brought us into being and continues to support us. As we explore the
meaning of human sexuality together by reading the Song of Songs allow us to hear
the celebration of life that is in these poems. Enable us to join in the celebration of
the full expression of human love. Amen.
What is the Song of Songs?
The Song of Songs is a collection of love poems. The poems appear to have been
collected in a haphazard fashion without a story line that links them clearly. They have
arranged here in a way which allows us a glimpse into what might have been the story behind
the poems. Traditional translations of the poems have been deliberately avoided because
most translations to hide the sensual, the erotic, the human passion that is embedded in these
songs of love. Rather, this translation treats them as Middle-Eastern erotic love poems.1 In
these songs we have primarily a celebration of human love rather than a parable or metaphor
of God’s love for Israel or Jesus’ love for the church.
The setting of the poems
The poems seem to be set in two places. First, a royal estate in the mountains of Lebanon
which is visited by the royal family from Jerusalem, a place of simplicity where nature takes
its course. Second, the city of Jerusalem itself, a place of palaces, of harems, of guards who
patrol the streets at night; a place of hostility and palace intrigue.
The characters in the poems
There appear to be three characters in the poem. First a young peasant woman on the royal
estate. Second the young prince of Jerusalem, Solomon. And third, the voice of a chorus:
’Compiled by Paul Germond based on the translations of Marvin Pope Song of Songs The Anchor Bible (New
York: Doubleday, 1977) and Marcia Falk The Song of Songs (SanFransisco: Harper, 1990). As with all
translations, especially of poetry, the translation offered here is not definitive but one way, among others, to read
these texts.
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Session 4: Reading About Sex: The Birds and the Bees
Page 2
the women of Jerusalem.
In the last session it was suggested that it would be good ifyou give different parts to
different people to read, and begin this session by reading the text together. The purpose of
this session is really to introduce participants to the principle text in the Bible that sees sex as
positive and enjoyable.
The Poems
The beginning:
I have arranged the poems in a way which tells a particular story. The story begins with a young
peasant woman whose family lives and works on a royal estate in the remote hill country of Lebanon.
One spring day she meets and falls in love with a young man whose identity is not known to her.
The poems begin with the young woman’s voice - it is spring time,
(w) The voice of my love!
Look, he comes,
leaping upon the mountains,
bounding over the hills.
My love is like a gazelle
or a young stag.
Look, there he stands at our wall
peeking in the window,
peering through the lattice.
My love speaks and says to me:
"Arise, my love, my fair one, and come away;
(m)
for now the winter is past,
the rain is over and gone.
The flowers appear on the earth:
the time for singing has come,
and the voice of the turtledove
is heard in our land.
The fig ripens her fruits,
the vines in bloom give scent.
Arise, my love, my fair one, and come away.
O my dove, in the clefts of the rock,
in the covert of the cliff,
let me see your form,
let me hear your voice;
for your voice is sweet,
and your form is lovely.
Catch us foxes, little foxes,
vineyard spoilers, for our vineyards are in bloom.”
(W)
My lover is mine and I am his;
he pastures his flock among the lilies.
They express their love to each other.
(W)
Ah, you are beautiful my darling,
(2:8-16)
Session 4: Reading About Sex: The Birds and the Bees
Page 3
ah, you are beautiful.
How handsome you are, my lover!
truly lovely.
Our couch is luxuriant,
the beams of our house are cedars,
our rafters are firs.
(1:15-17)
(M)
(Uni)
There is some mystery about his real identity.
(W)
Tell me, you whom my soul loves,
where do you pasture your flock,
where do you make it to lie down at noon;
for why should I be like one who is veiled
besides the flocks of your companions?
(1:7-8)
At some point he leaves the estate and returns to Jerusalem. Her dreams reveal the anxiety this
causes.
(w)
Upon my bed at night
I sought him whom my soul loves;
I sought him, but found him not;
I called him, but he gave no answer.
"I will rise now and go about the city,
in the streets and in the squares;
I will search for him whom my soul loves.”
I sought him, but found him not.
The guards found me
as they made their rounds in the city.
"Have you seen him whom my soul loves?"
Scarcely had I passed them
when I found him whom my soul loves.
I held him and would not let him go,
until I brought him into my mother's house,
to the room of her that had conceived me.
I slept, but my heart was awake.
Listen! My lover is knocking.
"Open to me, my sister, my love,
my dove, my perfect one;
for my head is wet with dew,
my locks with the drops of the night."
I had put off my garment;
how could I put it on again?
I had bathed my feet;
how could I soil them?
My love thrust his hand into the opening,
and my inmost being yearned for him.
I arose to open to my love,
and my hands dripped with myrrh,
my fingers with liquid myrrh,
(3:1-4)
2^
Session 4: Reading About Sex: The Birds and the Bees
upon the handles of the bolt.
I opened for my love,
but my love had turned and was gone.
My soul failed me when he spoke.
I sought him, but did not find him;
I called him, but he gave no answer.
Making their rounds in the city the guards found me;
they beat me, they wounded me,
they took away my mantle,
those watchmen of the walls.
She has an imaginary dialogue with the chorus, the daughters of Jerusalem.
(W)
I adjure you, O daughters of Jerusalem,
if you find my love,
tell him this;
I am faint with love. .
(Chorus)
(W)
What is your love more than another love,
O fairest among women?
What is your love more than another love
that you so adjure us?
My love is all radiant and ruddy,
distinguished among ten thousand.
His head is the finest gold;
his locks are wavy,
black as a raven.
His eyes are like doves
beside brimming pools,
bathed in milk, fitly set.
His cheeks are like beds of spices,
yielding fragrance.
His lips are like lilies,
distilling liquid myrrh.
His arms are rounded gold,
set with jewels.
His body is ivory work,
set with sapphires.
His legs are alabaster columns,
set upon bases of gold.
his appearance is like Lebanon,
choice as the cedars.
His speech is most sweet,
and he is altogether desirable.
This is my love and this is my friend,
O daughters of Jerusalem.
(Chorus)
Where has your love gone,
O fairest of women?
Which way has your love turned,
Page 4
(5:2-7)
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Session 4: Reading About Sex: The Birds and the Bees
that we may seek him with you?
Page 5
(5:8-6:1)
She also day-dreams about him.
(W)
I went down to the nut orchard,
to look at the blossoms of the valley,
to see whether the vines had budded,
whether the pomegranates were in bloom.
Before I was aware, my fancy set me
in a chariot beside my prince.
(6:11-12)
Then one day he returns to the estate and his return takes her by surprise.
What is that coming up from the wilderness,
like a column of smoke,
perfumed with myrrh and frankincense,
with all the fragrant powders of the merchant?
Look, it is the litter of Solomon!
Around it are sixty mighty men of Israel,
all equipped with swords
and expert at war,
each with a sword at his thigh
because of alarms at night.
King Solomon made himself a palanquin
from the wood of Lebanon.
He made its posts of silver,
its back of gold, its seat of purple;
its interior was inlaid with love.
(6:6-10)
To her shock she discovers that the royal procession brings her lover to her. He affirms his
love for her and asks her to return with him to Jerusalem.
(M)
You are altogether beautiful my love;
There is no flaw in you.
Come with me from Lebanon, my bride;
come with me from Lebanon.
Descend from the peak of Amana.
from the summit of Senir and Hebron,
from the dens of lions,
and the mountain haunts of the leopards.
You have ravished my heart, my sister, my bride.
You have stolen my heart.
(4:7-9)
She expresses natural feelings of inadequacy, How will she a coarse peasant girl fare in the
sophisticated royal city of Jerusalem?
(W)
L
I am black and beautiful
O daughters of Jerusalem,
like the tents of Kedar,
like the tent curtains of Solomon.
Do not stare at me because I am dark,
Session 4: Reading About Sex: The Birds and the Bees
because I am darkened by the sun.
My mother's sons were angry with me;
they made me keeper of the vineyards,
but my own vineyard I have not kept!
I am a rose of Sharon,2
a lily of the valleys.
Page 6
(1:5-6)
(2:1)
He attempts to reassure her.
(M)
(M)
Like a lily among brambles
is my darling among the maidens.
You are beautiful as Tirzah, my love,
comely as Jerusalem,
terrible as an army with banners.
Turn away your eyes from me,
for they overwhelm me!
Your hair is like a flock of goats,
moving down the slopes of Gilead.
Your teeth are like a flock of ewes,
that have come up from the washing:
all of them bear twins,
and not one of them is bereaved.
Your cheeks are like halves of a pomegranate
behind your veil.
There are sixty queens and eighty concubines,
and maidens beyond number.
My dove, my perfect one, is the only one,
the darling of her mother,
flawless to her that bore her.
The maidens saw her and called her happy;
the queens and concubines also,
and they praised her.
(2:2)
(6:4-9)
She asks for a seal of this love, a serious oath.
(W)
Set me as a seal upon your heart,
as a seal upon your arm;
for love is strong as death,
its jealousy unyielding as the grave.
It bums like blazing fire,
a raging flame.
Many waters cannot quench love,
neither can floods drown it.
If one offered for love
all the wealth of his house,
it would be utterly scorned.
(8:6-7)
The Rose of Sharon was the smallest most insignificant flower in the valleys of Lebanon.
J
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Session 4: Reading About Sex: The Birds and the Bees
Page 7
She returns to Jerusalem with him and the poems reflect their profoundly erotic love making.
(W)
(W)
(M)
Let him kiss me with the kisses of his mouth!
For your love is better than wine,
your anointing oils are fragrant,
your name is perfume poured out;
therefore the maidens love you
Draw me after you, let us make haste.
The king has brought me into his chambers.
(1:2-4)
He brought me to the banqueting house,
and his intention toward me was love.
Sustain me with raisins,
refresh me with apples,
for I am faint with love.
His left arm is under my head,
and his right arm caresses me.3
Daughters of Jerusalem, I charge you,
by the gazelles and by the does of the field,
that you disturb not, nor interrupt our love,
until it be satisfied.
(2:4-7)
You have ravished my heart,
my sister, my bride.
You have ravished my heart
with a glance of your eyes,
with one jewel of your necklace.
How sweet is your love, my sister, my bride!
How much better is your love than wine,
and the fragrance of your oils than any spice!
Your lips distill nectar, my bride;
honey and milk are under your tongue;
the scent of your garments
is like the scent of Lebanon.
(4:9-11)
The garden song. (The Middle-Eastern garden, small, surrounded by high walls, with running water,
lush growth, cool shade, and a haven from the desert heat and aridity was a favorite metaphor for
woman’s body ready for love.)
(M)
A garden locked is my sister, my bride,
a garden locked, a fountain sealed.
Your grove is an orchard of pomegranates
with all choices fruits,
henna with nard, nard and saffron,
calamus and cinnamon.
with all trees of frankincense,
myrrh and aloes, with all the chief spices;
a garden fountain, a well of living water,
and flowing streams from Lebanon.
’in Near Eastern love poetry this was the classic position for foreplay
2b
Session 4: Reading About Sex: The Birds and the Bees
(W)
Awake, O north wind,
and come, O south wind!
Blow upon my garden
that its fragrance may be wafted abroad.
Let my beloved come to his garden,
and eat its choicest fruits.
(M)
I come to my garden, my sister, my bride;
I gather my myrrh with my spice,
I eat my honeycomb with my honey,
I drink wine with my milk.
Page 8
(4:12-5:1)
Their lovemaking continues.
(W)
(M)
I am my beloved's,
and his desire is for me.
Come, my lover,
let us go to the countryside,
and spent the night in the villages;
let us go out early to the vineyards
and see whether the vines have budded,
whether the grape blossoms have opened,
and the pomegranates are in bloom.
There I will give you my love.
The mandrakes give forth fragrance,
and at our door is every delicacy,
both old and new.
There I will give you my love,
which I have stored up. for you, my lover.
How graceful are your feet in sandals,
O queenly maiden!
Your rounded thighs are like jewels,
the work of artist hands.
Your vulva a rounded bowl
that never lacks mixed wine.
Your belly a heap of wheat
encircled with lilies.
Your two breasts are like two fawns.
twins of a gazelle.
Your neck is like an ivory tower.
Your eyes are like pools in Hesbon,
by the gate of Bat-rabbim.
Your nose is like a tower of Lebanon,
overlooking Damascus.
Your head crowns you like Carmel,
and your flowing locks are like purple;
a king is held captive in its tresses.
How fair and pleasant you,
O loved one, with your delights!
(7:10-13)
■^7
Session 4: Reading About Sex: The Birds and the Bees
You are stately as a palm,
and your breasts are like its clusters of fruit.
I say I will climb the palm tree
and lay hold of its fruit.
Oh, may your breasts be like clusters of the vine,
the scent of your vulva like apples,
and your kisses like the best wine
flowing smoothly, stirring lover's lips.
Page 9
(7:1-9)
My beloved is mine and I am his.
Discussion
1.
What has hearing this read in the group meant to you?
What emotions has the reading raise?
Think of three words that describe your feelings.
Share these with the group.
Initiate a group discussion about these reactions. Revisit specific texts that generate a
reaction. You may need to name some emotions in order to get the group started, for example
happy, joyful, sexy, embarrassed. You might want to write up these emotions on a large piece
ofpaper as individual participants call them out. Once this has been done you should then
explore with the group what parts of the text gave rise to specific emotions.
2.
What message about sexuality is communicated by this reading?
Do you think that this translation should be read in Church? Why?
Lead a discussion on how people feel about such language, such imagery being in the Bible?
What kind ofmessage does it convey about sexuality?
You are exploring how participants feel about sexually explicit language being part of the
Bible. Some participants willfind this very exciting, but others may feel a bit more cautious,
some mayfeel embarrassed or even want it to be excluded. A good way to explore how
people feel might be to ask the question “Do you think these texts should be read in church? “
and then to probe participants to find out the reasons for participants answers.
3.
How is this view of sexuality different ffom/similar to:
a) your idea of sexuality?
b) what you think you church’s view on sexuality is?
c) other biblical views of sexuality?
You are asking participants to compare their own views ofsexuality with those in Song of
Songs. Is it the same or is it different? If it is the same how is it the same, let them give
examplesfrom the text. If it is different let them say how it is different. The second part of
this question allows each person to express what they see their own church's views on sex
are. Stress that each community is different and remind participants that each participant is
entitled to their own views on the matter, these may or may not be the same as those ofothers
in the same community. The third part of this question allows participants to think ofhow the
•2€
Session 4: Reading About Sex: The Birds and the Bees
Page 10
Song ofSongs compares with other passages that are not as positive about sex. You might
find it helpful to explain that many of the negative attitudes Christians have about sex came
about as the result ofa false dualism between body and spirit. A false dualism is the struggle
between two points of view which are seen as opposites when in fact they complement each
other. Because oferrors that crept into Western theology arising out of Greek translations of
Hebrew words, there has been a tendency to think of body and spirit as opposed to one
another. The spirit is usually seen as good, whilst the body is seen as evil, or lower than the
spirit. The British Council of Churches made a statement about this in 1982. We include
parts of the statement for your information and to read to the group ifyou feel this would be
useful:
In most cultures, the predominant image is of a ‘lower ’ or ‘outer ’ nature , which a
‘higher ’ or ‘inner' nature is supposed to control, at least at times. For instance the
proverb says: 'The body is a good servant but a bad master.' The true seat of the self is
supposed to be associated with the mind, the rational faculties of observation,
reflective judgement and will. The older language spoke of the 'soul' and the
'spirit'....The witness.of Christianity has its grounds for insisting on the unity of
individual personhood. Men and women are created by God and reflect his image.
The relationship between God and his creation is not that which contrasts 'spirit' with
'matter'. He is the maker of heaven and earth and ofall things visible and invisible.
The Church inheritedfrom the Old Testament a centuries old tradition which, in
sharp contrast to other cultures in the ancient world, insisted that both 'flesh' and
'spirit' are created by God; that a woman or man is 'ensouledflesh' with a
responsibility for the whole embodied self; that death of a body means a destruction
of the whole self, and hope beyond this life would have to be in terms of the
resurrection of the body. In Hebrew thought we desire God in a 'bodily' way; sexual
intercourse is an act of'knowing', ofbeing in communion with another person; the
physical delights ofsexual exchange are to be wholeheartedly encouraged and
enjoyed as expressions oflove and worship (Song ofSongs)
The document goes on to say that Christians base their insistence on the unity of a person on
the fact that “God was one with our bodily, human nature in the person ofJesus. This implies
that no part ofour bodily life is to be unclaimed or unsanctified by God: no part of our bodily
life is to be split offfrom the self. ”
4.
Do you feel that your sexuality is affirmed by these poems? Does God delight in your
sexuality?
This question reinforces what participants have learnt by making them think of how their
sexuality is seen as good by the Song ofSongs, and by God. This question is a private one
and not shared with the group.
Homework:
God loves you and has made you a sexual being. With this in mind write a letter from God to
you about your sexuality. You will not need to share this with anybody.
If you find this to be a very negative or difficult experience feel free to speak to the
coordinator about it.
<29
Facilitator’s Guide
- Session 5 -
Sexy Singles:
Sexuality and the Single Person
Our aim this session is:
►
to think about sexuality and single people
►
to try to understand the experience of single people
Prayer:
Dear God, Giver of life, Bearer of pain, Maker of love.
By becoming human in Jesus Christ
you affirm the goodness of the flesh.
May the desires of our bodies be fulfilled
in sacraments of love that enrich our lives;
in the name of Jesus Christ,
our Companion, our Lover, and our Guide.
Amen.
Activity
Last week you were asked to write a letter from God to you about your
sexuality. You don't have to share the letter but maybe you would like to talk
about how writing that letter made you feel.
Stress that we are not asking them to share the contents of their letter only how writing it
made them feel.
Be aware that this session may be difficult for single persons. Be ready to respond
appropriately.
Some Stories (very heterosexual)
Here are some stories of single persons for us to think about
Catherine
Catherine is a 40 year old single, professional woman. She has never married, and
after a series of failed relationships that included having sex, she has decided to remain single
and celibate She is quite content with her life, enjoying the company of a group of close
friends, both men and women, married and single. Though she recognises the need for
tenderness and love, she avoids sexual relationships as she believes they complicate
relationships, and that it is possible to be celibate and be a complete human being.
Monica
Monica is a 60 years old widow whose husband, Jack, died two years ago. Monica and
Jack had a happy marriage and enjoyed a satisfying sex life. After an initial period of deep
mourning, Monica began to start her life without Jack. She became involved in many
20
Session 5: Sexy Singles - Sexuality and the Single Person
Facilitators Guide
Page 2
activities, many of them involving her church. Monica and Fred, a widower who had been a
close friend of Jack, began to keep each other company and their relationship has developed
into a sexual one. They attend church regularly together. Neither Monica nor Fred wants to be
married again as they enjoy the independence that being single offers them. Besides this
Monica would loose Jack's military pension if she marries Fred. However, they both enjoy
their sexual relationship and see it as part of their friendship.
Thabo
Thabo is 35, divorced with two children aged 4 and 6 who live with him. When his
wife left him 18 months ago he felt as though his life had collapsed. He devotes most of his
free time to his children, and he enjoys their company. He also enjoys the company of his
friends, but he finds that he is lonely and misses the sexual relationship that he had with his
ex-wife. He has dated a number of women and had sex with most of them. He has not met
anyone he would like to marry and he intends to continue in this pattern of dating and having
sex as it meets his needs at the moment. He hopes to find a permanent partner some day.
Zinzi and Sipho
Zinzi and Sipho are in their late twenties. Both are working full time and studying part
time. They have been living together for three years and are quite happy with their present
arrangement. Neither has been unfaithful to the other and their relationship is one of deep
caring and love. They have spoken about marriage, but feel that it is not for them right now.
They are also unsure about making such a heavy commitment. Zinzi attends her local church
and would like to be more involved in helping with the youth group, but she is afraid that the
minister and congregation will find out that she is living with Sipho, and that they will reject
her or try to force her into marriage.
Denzel
Denzel is in his early twenties. He is a very committed Christian who is a virgin and
wants to stay that way until he is married. He has a strong sex drive and masturbates
regularly.
Activity
Discuss the following questions in the group:
►
What are your views on choosing to be celibate?
►
Has Catherine made a 'moral' choice, one that makes her happy, or
simply a choice that keeps her from complicated relationships?
►
What difficulties, if any, would you have if Monica and Fred were part
of your congregation, your social group, or even part of your family?
►
What is your attitude to Thabo's sex life?
►
What about Zinzi and Sipho? Can you accept that a sexual
relationship, including sexual intercourse, which is caring and loving,
and involves a real if not permanent commitment, is honest and right
when marriage is not part of it?
31
Session 5: Sexy Singles - Sexuality and the Single Person
Facilitators Guide
Page 3
What then is a "Single Person”?_____________________________________________
There are confusing images about single people. To some people it is being alone, while for
others it is not being married.
Activity
What picture do you have of single persons?
Think about this question but do not discuss it.
Of the following examples, which do you think are single people?
►
Pat and Roseanne share a house and are good friends
►
Pumla has her own flat but spends most of her time with Michael
►
Temba is a minister who wants to remain single but he loves Leanne
►
Priscilla is a single parent with two children
►
Richard is a widower, but still feels an emotional attachment to his
wife
►
Hansie and Anna Marie are separated but still want their relationship
to work
►
Maya and Phillip are engaged
In light of these examples discuss what a "single person" is in the group.
Celibacy and Singleness ____________________________________________
This section mostly gives information except for the questions at the end. Make sure
participants understand the material before they answer those questions.
Celibacy and singleness are often confused. A person may be single for a number of reasons.
A person is celibate as an act of deliberate choice. The choice to be celibate is usually made
as part of a larger commitment, such as one's faith. One can choose to be or not to be
celibate, as an expression of one's life, but one cannot choose whether or not to be sexual.
Here is a reflection from Thomas Merton who was a Roman Catholic monk.
Forty two years old and single.
One sometimes wishes...
Would that the Roman Church did not require
single ordained ministers.
But then
Even if the church did not require it,
God might ask it.
What if God,
in the mysterious, inscrutably loving ways of
calling,
would ask that one be single?
Would I let him/her make my heart
free enough, generous enough,
32
Session 5: Sexy Singes - Sexuality and the Single Person
Facilitators Guide
Page 4
to accept singleness?
Then again,
Others are single
with less choosing than I,
because the longed for, dreamed for, hoped for,
prayed for relationship
never came into being, or
because the other died or departed untimely, or
because...
So,
What to make of singles?
Being single.
One can become the centre of one's world,
with neither spouse nor offspring
impinging upon any/every moment of day and night.
All the while running to one pleasure,
and then another, to find happiness.
Or building bigger barns for all the rotting wealth,
for security;
Or endless activity.
Being single.
One might cherish the time and energy
not committed to another.
And let that time and energy be a
God-created, God-given Gift,
that one gives in turn,
freely and generously,
to many or to few,
to human and to God,
in love,
for the new creation.
Oh...
Jesus said,
'Blest are the single hearted.'
Who?
Me?
Not all have a religious calling to be celibate. Many people are single and do not choose to be
single.
<33
Session 5: Sexy Singles - Sexuality and the Single Person
Facilitators Guide
Page 5
Activity
In the group answer .these two questions. What does Merton say both to
people who choose celibacy and to people who didn't choose to be single:
►
about how they think about themselves?
►
about the choices they make about being single or celibate?
Be sure to be especially sensitive to the needs of the single people in the group. Respond to
them as you see appropriate. A time ofquiet for reflection or prayer might be good. If
appropriate ask them to talk about their experiences.
Something to think about
(you might want to include this section in today s session. It
can be given as homeworkfor the next session)
Here is a list of what single people might want from the church community:
For those who have always been single:
►
feeling of belonging
►
dealing with loneliness
►
recognition of sexuality
►
need for social life within the church
►
support networks
For widows and widowers:
companionship
to be included at functions
activities that include men/women
activities with people of different ages and family structures
help/exchange with household tasks
inclusion at times of public holidays and Christmas and Easter season
help when ill
For single parents:
►
recognition of one-parent families
►
inclusion in all activities
►
the church as extended family
►
support groups
►
suitable services, sermons, and traditions
►
a place to be accepted
►
supportive services such as;
help with the children
help with maintaining the house
help with financial planning and budgeting
counselling
Point out to participants the importance of thinking about the following questions as they will
be sharing some of their insights next session.
3<^
Session 5: Sexy Singles - Sexuality and the Single Person
Facilitators Guide
Page 6
Activity
Think about these lists yourself and answer the following questions for
yourself during the coming week:
►
What other needs do you think single people in your community
might have?
►
Which of the needs already listed is your church community already
dealing with?
►
What needs do you still need to meet?
►
Does your community recognise the sexuality of single persons? If it
doesn't how can it be helped to do this?
►
What can your church do to help single persons feel that they, and
their sexuality, are welcome in the church?
35
Facilitator’s Guide
- Session 6 -
Sexuality in Heterosexual Perspective
Our aim in this session is:
to affirm heterosexual expressions of sexuality
to affirm marriage as a vital context in which sexuality is expressed
►
to recognise that even within marriage the expression of sexuality can be very difficult
and painful
►
to start to explore whether heterosexuality is the only acceptable expression of
sexuality for Christians
Prayer:
O God, we thank you for your gift of love and its presence with us. We thank you for
all those who have committed themselves to a life of loving faithfulness to one
another. We thank you for the way in which you touch our lives with many loving
relationships. We thank you that we experience your love through the care and
physical affection of other people.
At the same time we remember and acknowledge to you O God, that we have often
failed to be loving and that we have often taken for granted the people for whom we
care most. We selfishly neglect and strain the bonds that unite us with others. For
give us O God, renew within us an affectionate spirit and enrich our lives with your
life-giving love so that we may embrace others with that same love.
Amen.
“Did You Know?” or “How Things Change!”
This is a fun information imparting section. It should be read aloud, you could once again
ask different people to read different “Did You Know's
Our understanding of human sexuality is incomplete and always being added to. Our
knowledge of both the psychology and biology of human sexuality are constantly growing
and being revised as new information and insights emerge.
DID YOU KNOW? In Medieval Catholic theology and science it was
believed that the male sperm carried the entire human heing — the female contributed
nothing to the reproductive process. She functioned only as a place in which the
sperm could attach itself and grow into a human person. Because they believed this,
they thought that masturbation was a sin because it caused the death of a whole
human being. In Medieval times an involuntary emission of semen (wet dream) was
punished with 7 day’s fasting, and 20 days fasting if it was the result of masturbation.
If a monh masturbated he was liable to a 30 day fast while the penalty for a bishop was
50 days. Coitus interruptus (withdrawing from penetration to ejaculate) landed a
3b
Session 6: The Heterosexual Understanding of Sexuality
Page 2
Facilitator’s Guide
penance lasting 2 to 12 years. 1
DID YOU KNOW? In the year 4004 BC, at precisely nine o’clock in-the
morning of Wednesday October 23, “God created man in his own image, in the
image of God he created him, male and female he created them.
The year, the day,
the hour of the creation of man and woman, not made specific in the Bible itself, were
calculated by two seventeenth-century scholars2 after long and detailed study of the
timing of events in the Old Testament. For 200 years their findings were widely
accepted in the Christian west.
DID YOU KNOW? Both St. Augustine and Thomas Aquinas did not want
to ban prostitution. Augustine said that though prostitution was dirty, immoral and
shameful, “yet to remove prostitutes from human affairs, and you will pollute things
with lust; set them among honest matrons, and you will dishonour all things with
disgrace and turpitude.” Aquinas compared prostitution with the filth in the sea or
the sewer in the palace. Take away the sewer and you will fill the palace with pollution.
Take away the prostitutes from the world,
rid, and
and you will fill it with sodomy.
DID YOU KNOW? In England in 1978, the Archbishop of Canterbury
decreed that over 200 married Anglican bishops attending the international Lambeth
conference should be segregated from their wives during the course of the three-week
conference. The bishops were housed at the University of Kent and their wives more
than a mile away.*
Activity — a stroll down memory lane:
►
Discuss what things about sexuality have changed in your own lifetime
with the group (like what is spoken about sexuality, what is allowed
and not allowed, marriage etc)
Singleness and Marriage
This is a brainstorm. Its purpose is to compare and contrast the experience ofsingle and
married people. Put up two sheets ofpaper on the wall. One titled “single life " the other
“married life. ” Divide each sheet into two columns “positive “ and “negative. ” Get
participants to brainstorm around these issues.
Activity: a brainstorm
►
Brainstorm about the positive and negative features of singleness and
marriage.
'Reay Tannahill Sex in History (Revised edition; USA: Scarborough House, 1992) 152.
2James Usher (1581-1656), Archbishop of Armagh and John Lightfoot (1602-1675), Master of Catherine
Hall, University of Cambridge.
3St. Augustine De Ordine 2.4.12; St. Thomas Aquinas Summa Theologica 11-11,10.11.
^Sunday Telegraph July 9, 1978.
3?
Session 6: The Heterosexual Understanding of Sexuality
Facilitator’s Guide
Page 3
Then answer the following questions:
►
What qualities constitute a good marriage?
►
Give examples of a good marriage.
Reading the Texts
Once again we are looking at some very important texts that influence the way we all think
about sexuality. These texts have traditionally been used to support the idea of heterosexual
relationships. We want participants to think whether this is the only way ofreading the texts.
We want participants to realise that these texts do not deal with such issues as contraception,
infertility, or the nature of marriage, love and sex. The texts have a particular theological
purpose that does not deal with these issues. The facilitator needs to ask participants to use
the texts to justify their own views, and to even challenge them when they can find no written
evidence from what the text says for their viewpoint. We want to begin putting the question in
participants minds, that ifthe texts do not deal with any of these issues is there any reason
why these texts should be used to speak against homosexuality? This will be discussed in
more detail in the next section.
Most of the dominant Christian views on marriage and sex rely on particular understanding of
Genesis 1:27-28 and 2:18-25. Lets read these passages specifically looking for what they
explicitly say about marriage and sexuality.
Genesis 1:27-28
L27So God created human.kind in his own image, in the image of God he
created them: malee and female
he created them. 28God blessed them, and God said to
fi
them, “Be fruitfulI and multiply,
and fill the earth and subdue it; and have dominion
mu.
over the fish of the
te sea and
am over the birds of the air an<id over every living thing that
moves upon th<e earth.”
Genesis 2:18-25
2 18Then the Lord God said, “It is not good for that the man should be alone; I
will make him a helper as his partner. l9So out of the ground the Lord God formed
W1J
every animal of the field and every bird of the air, and brought them to the man to see
wkat hiie would call them, and whatever the man called every living creature, that was its
name. 2(>rhe man gave names to all the cattle, and to the birds of the air, and to every
animal of the field; but for man there was not found a helper as his partner. 21 So the
Lord God caused a deep sleep to fall upon the man, and he slept; then he took one of
his ribs and closed up its place with flesh. 22And the rib that the Lord God had taken
from the man he made into a woman and brought her to the man. 231 hen the man
said, This at last is bone of my bone and flesh of my flesh; this one shall be called
Woman for out of man this one was taken. Thereafter a man leaves his father and
his mother and clings to his wife and they become one flesh. 25And the man and his
wife were both naked, and were not ashamed.
38
Session 6: The Heterosexual Understanding of Sexuality
Facilitator’s Guide
Activity
What do these texts say about:
1. Marriage
4. Sex
2. Divorce
5. Infertility
3. Contraception
6. Homosexuality
Page 4
7. Having children
First think about these questions on your own and then share them with the
group.
Is sex only for having children?
THE NUPTIAL BLESSING5
27
The Priest, standing before the couple, gives the Nuptial Blessing as follows
(28)
Merciful Lord antd heavenly Father, by your gracious gift human kind is increased:
bestow upon N an.d N the gift of children; and grant that they may so live together in
godly love and honest;ty, that they may bring up their children in faith and virtue, to
your praise and honour, through J esus Christ our Lord.
Amen.
Activity
The brackets around (28), indicate that this section of the liturgy may be left
out. What do you think are the reasons for this?
If sex is not solely for procreation, then is it possible that the Genesis creation
stories are about relationships, even sexual relationships between unmarried
people of the opposite sex or even two people of the same sex?
These questions are to be answered in small groups offour and then some discussion can
take place in the larger group.
Sex in Marriage
This might well be one of the more uncomfortable sections for participants. You need to
prepare yourself well for it - especially in responding pastorally to peoples ’ neeas. People
may feel the needfor counselling after this session. Have the resources at your finger tips
especially sex counsellors; sex therapists or counsellors or ministers in whom you have
'ry without having to explain
confidence. Make sure that participants know that they can cry
why ; that the group is there for them.
For many there is that assumption that if you are married then sex is no longer a difficult or
5Church of the Province of Southern Africa An Anglican Prayer Book (London: Collins, 1989) 468.
*1
3^
Session 6: The Heterosexual Understanding of Sexuality
Facilitator’s Guide
Page 5
painful issue. Its assumed that all is OK. But this is not always the case! For many married
people this area of their marriage is profoundly painful and never talked about.
Some stories
Ramesh and Gita have not made 1<love for 6 moniths.
Gita has had a very brief. affai
^-.air with
anoth<er man, which Ramesh d oes not k:mow about, and she feels too guilty to make love to
him.
Phyllis, a 70 year old woman, married to Tom for 50 years, discovers h<er clitoris for the first
time at a workshop on women s sexuality
Johannes comes home drunk every Friday night and forces Marie to have sex with him.
Abdul and Leila have a very stressed sex life because Abdul is impotent.
In Zanele’s marriage to Jabiu sex is extremely unpleasant for her because Jahu likes to have dry
sex and she uses herbs to keep her vagina dry.
air with
his secretary. She feels
vz
Janet knows that her husband Lawrence is having an affair
’ ’hiim which he seems to want even
betrayed, insecure, and angry,, and unable
una
to h.ave sex with
more since the affair began.
Activity
►
Talk about your emotional responses to these scenarios in pairs.
Think about the following questions on your own:
►
If you are single think about your parents sex life. How good do you
think it was. In what ways might it affect your sex life?
►
If you are married or in a relationship think about your own sex life.
Does it affirm you and enhance intimacy and closeness with your
partner?
►
What do you think that God thinks of your sex life?
In Session 5 we saw that God can delight in our sexuality. God created us sexual beings. But
our sexual behaviour might bring hurt and pain both to us and to others. We need to
recognise this difference and it might mean that we need to change the way in which we
behave. If you are experiencing difficulties in you sex life then don’t be quiet about it. Make
an effort to speak to someone about it. If you are in a relationship deal with it as soon as
possible. Don’t let it fester. God does not want sex to be a source of pain and guilt. It should
be a positive, enriching part of life.
Prayer/Refl ection:
A time ofprayer or reflection is suggested here. Lead it in a way which you feel
would best meet the needs of the group. Silent, open, or read a written prayer.
Session 6: The Heterosexual Understanding of Sexuality
Facilitator’s Guide
Page 6
Preparation for the next session: A Questionnaire
The reason why participants are given this questionnaire to do is so that they do not come to
the next session without giving the issue of homosexuality some thought. We are not wanting
people merely to approach the next two sessions in a biassed way. We want participants to
think about their views and why they have them, whether these are positive or negative. The
important point is that participants need to make informed decisions about their own
sexuality and that of others.
The purpose of this questionnaire is to introduce the discussion of homosexuality which we
will begin next week. Answer the questions briefly^or circle where appropriate.
1.
How would you feel if your son or daughter were gay?
2.
If your child were gay, or lesbian, would you want to know?
3.
If a co-worker of yours were gay or lesbian, would you want to know?
4.
What would be your reaction if you saw two men holding hands in church?
Pleased?
Surprised?
Uncomfortable?
Disgusted?
5.
Do you believe that children should be educated about homosexuality and
homophobia?
If yes, who should supply the education?
What should it consist of?
6.
All homosexual activity is a sin.
Agree
Disagree
Uncertain
7.
Homosexuality is merely one form of sexuality.
Agree
Disagree
Uncertain
8.
Homosexuality is a matter of personal choice.
Agree
Disagree
Uncertain
9.
Homosexuality is an inborn trait.
Agree
Disagree
Uncertain
10.
Homosexuality can be tkcured'7changed.
Agree
Disagree
Uncertain
Session 6: The Heterosexual Understanding of Sexuality
Facilitator’s Guide
11.
Do you know any gay or lesbian person?
12.
Do you have any friends who are gay or lesbian?
13.
Circle the sources you rely on for your knowledge of homosexuality.
Experience of gay friends
Media
Straight friends
Gay people
The Bible
Independent study
Family
Church
Page 7
Now read this: What causes homosexuality then?
One answer to the question of what causes homosexuality it another question: What causes
heterosexuality? These two questions are essentially the same question: What causes sexual
orientation?
Very few people who study this question support the idea that sexual orientation can
be chosen. Most such scholars believe that there is a combination of two main causes of
sexual orientation: biological causes or social causes.
Those scientists who favour biological influences on sexual orientation refer to studies
that variations in prenatal hormones may have some effect. Others suggest that levels of
stress on the mother during pregnancy may contribute to sexual orientation.
Other scholars support the idea that sexual orientation is affect strongly by events
occurring early in the child’s development.
Many scientists believe that the origins of human behaviour are extremely complex,
and that it is not easy at all to understand what causes sexual orientation. They state that there
may be a combination of hereditary (biological) and environmental (social) roots and perhaps
that our sexual orientations may not necessarily stem from the same roots.
Virtually all these scholars agree that whatever happens to trigger the development of
a heterosexual or homosexual person happens either before birth or very early in the child’s
life. It is seldom something that is simply chosen.
Think about the following questions in preparation for the next session:
Has what you have read changed what you thought about homosexuality?
What do you now think about gay and lesbian sexual orientation?
Participant’s Guide
Session 7
Sexuality in Homosexual Perspective
Our aim in this session is: 5 ‘
►
to understand our own sexuality more fully
►
to explore the changeable nature of sexual attraction between people
►
to try to understand more of what the homosexual experience in the church is like
Prayer:
As we come to look at our won sexuality more closely, and to understand the
experience of gay and lesbian people, give us O God, a renewed sense of love and
compassion for one another. Enable us both to listen and to speak with gentleness and
courage. Amen.
Some stories
Jan grew up always knowing that he was different from the other boys around him. In high
school it became clear to him that he was attracted to boys rather than girls. He went to
speak to his minister about it who told him that his feelings were evil, and that God would
punish him if he did not change. Jan spent years denying his homosexuality. When he cou Id
no longer he went for healing from what he was told was a sickness; some even said he was
possessed. After years of desperation and futility, and feeling abandoned by God, he ended his
life.
Mary was married at twenty h::nowing that it was a mistake. She had two children and by the
time she was 40 her marriage had collapsed completely. Then she met a woman with whom
she fell in love and came to accept and Liove the fact that she was a lesbian. She is now
divorced and is happily settled with Joan, despite having suffered immensely from the
condemnation of her children and ex husband.
Renee and Lerato have been in a faithful relationship for 15 years. A year ago they legally
adopted a hahy hoy J ames. Because of the prejudice and exclusion they have experienced over
ers of a church.
the years, Renee amd Lerato are no longer members
Herman and Andre have enjoyed a faithful and committed relationship for 25 years . They are
memb ers of a church congregation and are both active in ministry - Herman is Churci:h
Ward,,en and Andre is leader of the music group.
Mpho is headmistress of a leading school. She decided early in her career to dedicate h<erself
to education, as a substitute for being in an intimate relationship. She knew that she was
lesbian from her days at university and felt that she could not afford to come out or ever be in
a relationship.
Session 7, Sex in homosexual perspective
Page 2
Abie is at theological college. He feels God is calling him to ordination, and the church
thinks so too. Yet he is in crisis about his sexua1 identity. He is increasingly aware of his very
deep attraction to a fellow student. This is new for him. He has never been attracted to
women or men Now it is happening to him and he doesn’t know what to do. He feels as if he
is more complete because of this, that part of his life that has been suppressed for years is now
blossoming, but it scares him to death.
Activity
In the group, discuss how you feel about these stories.
The Church Council
Activity:
Pretend that the group is a church council, and that one of the Church
Wardens has resigned and needs to be replaced. There are two nominees:
1) a long term member of the church council who is open about his
homosexuality and has been living in a faithful relationship for 15
years.
2) a married woman, long term member of the church, who is openly
having a wild heterosexual affair.
Discuss the issue and then take a vote on who you want to be church warden.
Desmond Tutu has written about the manner in which the church has traditionally treated gay
and lesbian people. He says:__________________________________________________
we reject them, treat them as pariahs, and push them outside of the confines of our
church communities, and thereby we negate the consequences of their baptism and
ours. We make them doubt that they are the children of God, and this must nearly be
the ultimate blasphemy.1
Where are you on the field?
Homosexuality has been treated as a problem within the Church. The way Christians talk
about and behave towards gay, lesbian and bisexual (people attracted to others of both sexes)
people leaves many feeling like a soccer ball. Listen to their voice.
Those o:f us who are lesbian, gay or bisexual have sat on the siiide lines watching Christians
tackling each other (or the ball o( our lives.
►
Wkten the fundamentalists get hold of us they kick us into the goal marked ‘an
unnatural sexual act which is deliberately chosen, explicitly condemned by God’:s word’
and then they say to us get cured or get out of the Church.
When the conservatives get hold of us they kicks it into the goal marked ‘sexual
behaviour not deliberately chosen, probably born that way, but sexual activity still
‘Desmond Tutu “Foreword” We Were Baptised Too (London: SCM, 1996).
Page 3
Session 7: Sex in homosexual perspective
condemned by God’is word.” They say it is OK to Le it, but its not OK to engage in
When tke liberals get bold of us, they kick that us back and forward, up and down tke
field; finally they stand in the middle and declares that, although scripture and
tradition do condemn homosexual acts, they did not know as much about
komosexuakty as we do today; so although the Church has a duty to uphold the ideal
of heterosexual marriage, because that is what scripture and tradition teach,
homosexual relationships might be looked upon as falling short of this ideal but not
sinful as such because we can’t help it. They then run off tke field before the crowd
and players can get them.
The radicals bounce us up and down on their heads, doing amazing tricks whilst they
explains “Yes, marriage is the ideal, but lesbian and gay people are perfectly capable of
marriage/ They know lesbian and gay people are as capable of forming committed
stable relationships as any heterosexual couple. They ask What is the difference
between them and straight couples who cannot have children?” Then they say “They
are just like us, so let’s welcome them into the institution of marriage’ and expect us to
.dicals cannot understand it: they
give them a round of applause. When we don’t the radicals
tkeir
careers, to speak out for
are hurt, for they have risked they reputations, even
tkeir lesbian sisters and gay brothers. They turn to us and ask, “Wkat do you want
then?’
And with one voice we answer: “Can we kave our ball back please? We are tired of
other Ckristian people kicking aroun<d tke ball of our lives. We are tired of being
treated as a “problem” or an “issue ” instead of full members of tke Ckristian
community.
Activity
Having read this piece aloud in the group:
►
make sure you understand what it is about
►
then spend sometime thinking about where you are on the field
►
now discuss this in groups of four and then report back to the group
Finding myself on the scale
Sometimes it is easier to deal with other people’s sexuality. This will be a time when you
will be asked to be quite honest about your own sexuality.
Male (M) or Female (F) or Both (B)
Who do I most socialize with?
Who am I emotionally closest to?
Who have I had sex with?
Who do I spend most time with?
in the past
in present
ideally
Session 7. Sex in homosexual perspective
Page 4
Who am I sexually attracted to?
Whom do I fantasize about having sex with?
Who do I feel most comfortable spending time
with?
Having done this exercise find yourself on this scale:
homosexual"*
0
bisexual
1
2
3
^"heterosexual
4
5
6
0 = attracted to same sex only
1 = nearly exclusively attracted to same sex
2 = more attracted to same sex, but with some other sex attraction
3 = attracted, fairly equally, to both sexes
4 = more attracted to opposite sex, but with Some same sex attraction
5 = nearly exclusively attracted to opposite sex
6 = attracted to opposite sex only
Are you confused? Well that might well be the case because you might be confronting the
fact for yourself that for you, as for many other people, your sexuality is not clear cut and
fixed. It can change, it can be rich and varied. We are far more complex than we often
believe and that the church and society would like us to believe. Are you in pain? Are you
secure and comfortable?
Reflective activity
Take time to explore how you feel and share your feelings with God.
You are also welcome to talk with the facilitator or any other participant if
you wish.
Action
What does this session mean for the way your church treats lesbian and gay
people? Do you as a group feel that you can do something about it?
For the next session
Read the Preparation for Session Eight.
Begin thinking about the worship service in two weeks time - Celebrating Sexuality. You as
a group need to decide how you are going to plan it.
Facilitator’s Guide
- Session 8 r
The Texts Speak! Or Do They?
Homosexuality and the Bible
Our aim for this session is:
►
to look together at the meaning of the six texts traditionally used to condemn
homosexuality
►
to expose you to a different reading of these texts
►
to help you reach your own understanding of them
Prayer:
Creator God, we are aware that our understanding of the Bible is always incomplete,
and that we are always on a journey of discovery. We recognise that inadequate
understandings of the scriptures have often led to divisions within the church. In
many cases the church has cut off members who interpret the Bible differently from
the dominant group. It has led to the church rejecting prophetic voices, and failing to
embrace new experiences and new people. Allow us to be faithful to Jesus, who is the
Word. Grant that guided by the Spirit, we and our churches may find and embrace the
life giving and healing power of the Scriptures. Amen.
Genesis 19:1-29
Did you know?
In some cultures in the time of ancient Israel after a hattie the victorious general or
king would sometimes rape the defeated commander. I his was a sign of his power and
the humiliation of the enemy. It was no great thing for a man to rape a woman,
because a woman was weak. But to rape a man reflected well on a man s power and
dignity.
Activity
In pairs talk about these questions.
►
What do you think the central message of the Sodom story is?
►
Read Judges 19:16-29. What does it add to our reading of Genesis 19?
►
What do these passages have to say about loving lesbian or gay
relationships?
►
How do you think these passages are helpful in developing a Christian
understanding of sexuality?
Leviticus 18:22; 20:13_______________________________________________________
These two verses come from what is called the Holiness Code of Leviticus (Leviticus 17-26).
The aim of the Holiness Code was to teach the people of Israel how to live a pure life so that
they could live in the land that God had given them (see Leviticus 20:22-25).
47
Session 8: Homosexuality and the Bible
Page 2
Activity
Allocate pairs a chapter from Leviticus 17-26. Count the commandments in
each of the chapters that are read. Count all the commandments that are no
longer observed by Christians.
Many laws in the Holiness Code are no longer observed by Christians. Consistency and
fairness seem to dictate that if the Israelite Holiness code is to be used against twentieth
century homosexuals, it should also be used against such common practices as eating rare
steak, wearing mixed fabrics, and having marital intercourse during the menstrual period
which are all prohibited in the Holiness Code.
Activity
In light of this discussion how should Leviticus 18:22 and 20:13 be used in our
Christian understanding of lesbian and gay relationships?
Discuss this question together in the group.
1 Corinthians 6:9-11 and 1 Timothy 1:8-11 and Romans 1:18-32
Did you know?
►
The Apostle Paul, like all his contemporaries, had no understanding of
homosexual orientation. He probably had no idea that people might be natural
lesbian or naturally gay.
►
He believed, like most oth ers of his time, that homosexual.1 acts were chosen in
preference to what was assumed to be the natural heterosexua..1 orientation of all
people.
►
Paul simply made the assumption that everybody was heterosexual. Those who
chose to engage in homosexual acts were doing it against their true nature.
Activity
Does this information change the way you think about these texts?
Discuss this question in groups of four.
Inclusive and Exclusive Ways of Reading Scripture
Once we have tried to answer the question of what the texts mean a very important question
still remains. From what point of view do we read these texts? Whatever we think these 6
texts say we need to examine the perspective we read them from.
Did You Know?
Each one of us has some idea off what
what we think the central message of the Bible is.
We read the Bible in this light, and we understand individual passages in light of this
central message. Sometimes we
we read
reai some texts from one perspective and other texts
from another perspective. A good illustration of this is the purity laws we looked at in
Leviticus. We read them in the light of the death of Christ and decide that they no
to
Session 8: Homosexuality and the Bible
Page 3
longer apply to us today. We do this kind of sifting out all the time when we read the
biLie.
In the matter of gay and lesbian people there are two ways in which we can read the bible:
an inclusive way, or an exclusive way
Activity
On two separate sheets of paper brainstorm as many words that have the
same meaning as inclusive and then exclusive. Then write down words that
represent emotions that you would feel if you were included or excluded.
Examples of an inclusive theology
Jesus challenged the systems of exclusion of his day. The practices of exclusion then
were required by the Old Testament. But Jesus went against them. He read the Old
Testament critically. So he chose to ignore those parts of the Old Testament that
required that lepers, prostitutes, gentiles, sinners, and many other people who were
unclean, be excluded from God’s presence in the temple. Mark’s gospel closes with
the curtain that separated the Holy of Holies in the temple tom from top to bottom,
signifying that all people, not just the High Priest, could enter into the presence of
God.
Paul spent his energies breaking down the wall of exclusion between Jew and Gentile.
He believed that in Christ this wall of division had been broken down, but it was a
biblical wall! Paul said that in Christ there is no longer Jew and Gentile, slave and
free, male and female (Galatians 3:28). He nau an inclusive theology.
The church reinterprets the bible all the time. Four examples:
Slavery. There are many texts in the bible (eg Ephesians 6:5-8) that
legitimate slavery. But the Christian church led the struggle against slavery and
against those who said that slavery was a biblical institution by claiming that the
central message of the bible was an inclusive message, there is no longer slave and
free.
Women in the Church. There are many texts in the bible (eg 1 Timothy
2:11-15) that heavily restrict the role of women in the church. But in many quarters
the church has ordained women priests and bishops. Here the church is saying, there
is neither male nor female! The message of Christ is an inclusive message, and we
must challenge every attempt to exclude categories of people from the full
participation in the life of the church.
Apartheid. Apartheid, a system of radical exclusion, was justified by the
bible. It was the inclusive message of Jesus Christ that most effectively challenged
and defeated the exclusive message of apartheid.
Divorce. The teaching of Jesus appears to be quite clear on the matter of
divorce. No divorce is allowed (see session 3). Yet many churches allow divorce
under certain circumstances and allow divorcees to remarry if they fulfill certain
conditions. Many ministers in churches are divorced and remarried. The church has
included these people who would have previously been excluded.
Session 8: Homosexuality and the Bible
Page 4
Reading exclusive texts inclusively
Now we can choose to read the 6 texts that have traditionally been used to condemn
homosexuality, whatever they may actually say, from an inclusive or an exclusive
perspective.
From an exclusive perspective these texts can be used to develop a theology that
excludes loving, practising gay and lesbian people from full participation in the
church; refusing to listen to lesbian and gay people, refusing to recognise and support
their relationships, excluding them from leadership in the church.
If we read these texts from an inclusive perspective then even if we think they say
that homosexuality is wrong, we are not bound to follow them. We may rather say
that they are like many other biblical texts, texts of exclusion that need to be
interpreted in the light of the inclusive message of Jesus Christ.
Activity
Which perspective do you think is reflects the best understanding of the
Bible?
Why do you think this?
Think about this on your own for a few minutes and then discuss in the
group.
Evaluation
Which of these faces best represents the way yoi fee’ after being a part of this session? Talk
about this in the group.
Homework
Prepare for the worship session next week.
5o
Facilitator’s Guide
- Preparation for Session 8 -
Homosexuality and the Bible
Our aim for this homework session is for you:
►
to read the texts that have been used traditionally by the church to condemn
homosexuality
►
to reflect on these texts
►
to ask whether we can use them as a blanket condemnation of all homosexual
relationships
Traditional Texts Used to Condemn Homosexuality
Traditionally the Church has used three texts in the Old Testament (Genesis 19:1-29,
Leviticus 18:22, 20:13 and Judges 19:16-30) and three from the New Testament (Romans
1:18-24,1 Corinthians 6:9-11 and 1 Timothy 1: 8-11) to condemn same-sex sexual activity in
all its forms.
There is a very serious debate about the meaning of these texts in modem scholarship.
No longer is there a simple answer to what these texts mean.
But this session is Lvie for you to make judgements for yourself. So lets turn to live
of the six texts and see what they say and how they have been interpreted. Judges 19 is looked
at in Session 9.
Genesis 19:1-29
’The two angels came to Sodom in the evening, and Lot was sitting in the gateway of
Sodom. When Lot saw them, he rose to meet them, and bowed down with his face to the
ground. 2He said, "Please, my lords, turn aside to your servant’s house and spend the night,
wash your feet; then you can rise early and go on your way." They said, "No; we will spend
the night in the square." 3But he urged them strongly; so they turned aside to him and entered
his house; and he made them a feast, and baked unleaven bread, and they ate. 4But before
they lay down, the men of the city, the men of Sodom, both young and old, all the people to
the last man, surrounded the house; 5and they called to Lot, "Where are the men who came to
you tonight? Bring them out that to us, so that we may know them." 6Lot went out of the
door to the men, shut the door after him 7and said, "I beg you, my brothers, do not act so
wickedly. 8Look, I have two daughters who have not known a man; let me bring them out to
you, and do with them as you please; only do nothing to these men, for they have come under
the shelter of my roof." 9But they replied, "Stand back!" And they said, "This fellow came
here as an alien, and he would play judge! Now we will deal worse with you than with
them." Then they pressed hard against them and Lot, and came near the door to break it
down. ,0But the men inside reached out their hands and brought Lot into the house with
them, and shut the door. 1 'And they struck with blindness the men who were at the door of
the house, both small and great, so that they were unable to find the door.
5/
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Preparation for Session 8: Homosexuality and the Bible
12Then the men said to Lot, "Have you anyone else here? Sons-in-law, sons,
daughters, or anyone you have in the city - bring them out of the place. 13For we are about to
destroy this place, because the outcry against its people has become great before the LORD,
and the Lord has sent us to destroy it."
24Then the Lord rained on Sodom and Gomorrah sulfur and fire from the Lord out of
heaven; 25and he overthrew those cities, and all the Plain, and all the inhabitants of the cities
and what grew on the ground.
There would seem to he four possible ways of understanding this story:
►
the people of Sodom were destroyed for the general wickedness w!4iich made God send
►
►
►
the angels to investigate the city in the first place
the city was destroyed because the people of Sodom had wanted t<o rape the angels
’"ils
the city was destroyed because the men of Sodom were homosexuals
the city was destroyed for the inhospitable treatment of visitors sen'Lt fliom the Lord
Activity
Which one do you think is the correct reading of the text?
What are some of the reasons for your response?
DO YOU KNOW what the Bible says about the sin of SocLom?
The Old. Testament passages which refer to Sodom have a list of sins in mind:
►
But in the prophets of Jerusalem I have seen a horrible thing: they commit adultery
and walk in lies; they strengthen the hands of evildoers, so that no one turns from his
wickedness; all of them have become like Sodom to me, and its inhabitants like
►
Gomorrah (Jeremiah 23:14).
slii and her daughters had pride,
Behold this was the guilt of your sister Sodom:: she
surfeit of good, and prosperous ease, but did not aidike poor and needy. They were
haughty, and did abominable things before me; therefore I removed them when I saw
it (Ezekiel 16:49-50).
The New Testament refers to Sodom as a pointer to divine judgement
►
"Truly I tell you, it will be more tolerable for the land of Sodom and Gomorrah on the
day of judgement than for that town [a town that rejects the Apostles] (Matthew
10:15, Luke 10:12)
►
"Likewise, just as it was in the days of Lot: they were eating and drinking, being and
selling, planting and building, but on the day that Lot left Sodom, it rained fire and
sulfur from heaven and destroyed all of them — it will be like that on the day the Son
of Man is revealed” (Luke 17:28-30).
►
"And if by turning the cities of Sodom and Gomorrah to ashes he condemnedid them to
extinction and made them an example of what is coming to the ungodly; amd if he
rescued Lot, a righteous man greatly distressed by the licentiousness of the Lawless,
then the I-ord knows how to rescue the godly from trial and to keep the unriighteous
under punishment until the day of judgement” (2 Peter 2:6,7,9).
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51
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Preparation for Session 8: Homosexuality and the Bible
►
“Likewise, Sodom and G<omorrah and tli<:e surrounding cities, which, in the same
sexual immorality:y and went after the flesh, serve as and
manner as they, indulged in zc:
---- ishment of eternal il fire” (Jude 7)
example by undergoing a punis
Leviticus 18:22; 20:13
Leviticus 18 22you
not
a maje
a woman«
js an abomination (to'evah).
Leviticus 2o i3a man ijes
a maje
a woman,
of them shall have committed and
abomination (to'evah); they shall be put to death, their blood is upon them.
Most Christians who read these two texts understand them to be a blanket condemnation of
all homosexual activity. But think about them a little more deeply.
Did. you know?
In Leviticus 18:20 and 20:13 male homosexu;al behaviour is described as to'evah
(ahomination). The use of this word provid<les us with a clue as to the reason why male
homosexuality was rejected in Israel.
Too evah
c
is used by biblical writers to refer to
practices that were idolatrous. It seems fr<:om 1 Kings 14:24, 15:24 and 22:46 that
male homosexual activity in ancient Israel was a practice found in foreign religions,
where male prostitutes were part of the worship.
Activity
What do you think?
1 Corinthians 6:9-11 and 1 Timothy 1:8-11
i Connthians 6:9j^0 yQU not
wrongdoers will no inherit the kingdom of God? Do
not be deceived! Fornicators, idolaters, adulterers, male prostitutes (malakoi), sodomites
(arsenokoitai), I0thieves, the greedy, drunkards, revilers, robbers — none of these will inherit
the kingdom of God. 1 ’And this is what some of you used to be. But you were washed, you
were sanctified, you were justified in the name of the Lord Jesus Christ and in the Spirit of
our God.
i Timothy 18 jqow we know that the law is good, if one uses it legitimately. 9This means
understanding that the law is laid down not for the innocent but for the lawless and
disobedient, for the godless and sinful, for the unholy and profane, for those who kill their
father and mother, for murderers, fornicators, sodomites (apsenokoitais), slave traders, liars,
perjurers, and whatever else is contrary to the sound teaching 1 ’that conforms to the glorious
gospel of the blessed God, which he entrusted to me.
The two Greek words malakoi and arsenokoitai are often translated as one word to
mean "homosexuals” or "sodomites”. But a quick look at the way these two words are
translated in modem version of the Bible shows that there is no clear understanding of what
they mean at all.
I
53
Page 4
Preparation for Session 8: Homosexuality and the Bible
Did you know that the meaning of the two words malakoi an d aresenokoitai is not
at all clear f Study this chart and see!
1 Corinthians 6:9
1 Corinthians 6:9
1 Timothy 1:10
arsenokoitai
arsenokoitai
malakoi
RSV1946
homosexual
sodomites
RSV 1971
sexual perverts
perverts
NRSV 1989
male prostitutes
sodomites
sodomites
NIV 1978
male prostitutes
homosexual
perverts
offenders
New English Bible 1970
homosexual perversion
perverts
sexual pervert
perverts
Revised English Bible
1989
Jerusalem Bikie 1968
catamites
sodomites
those who are
immoral with hoys
or with men
Good News Bible 1976
homosexual perverts
sexual perverts
Did you know?■?
Malakoi was a very common Greek word which essentially means “soft”. There is no
reason at all to have to translate it with reference to homosexuality. It could simply
refer to a person who is morally weak, probably, given the context, sexually
promiscuous.
Did you know?
In the ancient Greek world men who were homosexually active were NOT regarded as
effeminate or “soft”. When a man had sex with a woman it was believed that he
become effeminate because he absorbed th<.e women’s weak essence during lovemaking,
In contrast a man derived strength and manliness
in having intercourse with males.
li
The strongest men of the ancient world
Atl,as and Hercules — were famous for the
many male lovers they had.
What do these two words mean?
►
There is considerable discussion among modem scholars about these two words. It is
not at all clear what they mean and how they should be translated. Clearly they have
to do with some kind of sexual offence, but what it is is not actually clear.
Preparationfor Session 8: Homosexuality and the Bible
Page 5
What do you think?
ROMANS 1:18-32
Romans i i«por
wrath of God is revealed from heaven against all ungodliness and
wickedness of men who by their wickedness suppress the truth. For what can be known
about God is plain to them, because God has shown it to them. 22(Yet) claiming to be wise,
they became fools, and exchanged the glory of the immortal God for images resembling
mortal man or birds or animals or reptiles.
2 24Therefore God gave them up in the desires of their hears to impurity, to the
dishonouring of their bodies among themselves, 25because they exchanged the truth about
God for a lie and worshipped and served the creature rather than the Creator, who is blessed
forever! Amen.
26For this reason God gave them up to dishonourable passions. Their women
exchanged natural relations for unnatural, 27and the men in the same way gave up natural
relations with women and were consumed with passion for one another, men committing
shameless acts with men and receiving in their own bodies the due recompense for their error.
There are at least three ways of understanding this passage:
►
That because Paul moves directly from idolatry to homosexual relations, he was
concerned primarily with homosexual cultic practices. Paul, it is claimed, associates
such sexual behaviour with orgiastic pagan rites in honour of false gods.
►
That Paul is arguing from nature and not from what he regards as the law of God. An
example of this kind of argument is found in 1 Corinthians 11:15 when Paul argues
that nature teaches us that for men to have long hair is degrading. What is the status
of “natural” and “unnatural” in Romans 1? Could it be that Paul is concerned about
people who are "naturally" heterosexual who indulge “unnaturally” in homosexual
relations. If this is so the text does not refer to gay people who are homosexual in
orientation. For them it would be unnatural to be involved in heterosexual relations.
►
That Paul understood homosexuality simply as being part of the godless and impure
world.
You have spent a lot of time reading the six texts which have been used to condemn
homosexuality by the Church.
What do you think these texts mean for us today?
We’ll talk about this at length in the next session.
55
Facilitator’s Guide
Session 9
The Naked Prayer
Celebrating Sexuality
Our aim in this session is:
to celebrate our sexuality as a gift of God
►
to recognise that for some of us our sexuality may be a source of conflict and pain
to ask forgiveness of and change from destructive behaviour and attitudes
to have fun with God and one another as we bring this journey we have been on
together to an end.
Julian of Norwich an English mystic wrote in 1393:
For I saw with absolute certainty that our whole being and body [substance] is in
God, and moreover that God is in the way we use our senses and sexuality [our
sensuality] too. The moment that the soul was made sensual, at that moment it was
destined from all eternity to be the dwelling place of God and God shall never leave
it.
We would like you to celebrate together what you have learned and experienced with one
another in this course. Worship can take many forms and it is up to you to design a service
that will it best reflect your journey together. What follows are suggestions that you can
consider.
►
You might use traditional forms such as the Eucharist, or Evening Prayer, but even
here there is a great deal of space for involvement by all the members of the group. If
you have a Eucharist make sure that the person celebrating the Eucharist understands
what these sessions have been all about. Check that the group is comfortable with him
or her.
►
If you design your own service from scratch you could consider the following
elements that could make up a service:
►
praise and thanksgiving
►
repentance and assurance of forgiveness
►
scripture or other readings
►
a meditation on the readings
►
some sharing around what you have gained from this course
►
prayers
►
a final blessing
Praise
In praise we praise God for who God is and in thanksgiving respond to what God has done
for us, shown us, or even taught us. Throughout these sessions we have focussed on God's
gift of sexuality. Maybe the praise could focus on what it means to love a God who has
created us so wonderfully as sexual beings. Here we could choose to sing songs, or offer a
5b
Session 9: Celebrating Sexuality
Page 2
dance, a flower or any item from nature, or a picture, to God that shows our love for God.
Remember that God has given us all our senses, touch, smell, hearing, sight, and so we can
praise God using any of these - praise doesnt just need to be words. You might use some
verses from the Psalms to introduce the praise. Some examples of such psalmS are Psalm
100:1-2, 3-4; 147:1 ; 150:1-2,6. Alternately words frofh the New Testament might be used
such as Philippians 2:10-11 or John 1:14.
Thanksgiving
In thanksgiving you could think about what you have learned both as a group and as
individuals about sexuality and our faith and give God thanks for this. You could thank God
for what you have learned about the Bible and human sexuality. Individuals might want to
write a prayer, or even share something from any one of the sessions that they Want to give
thanks for. One of the ways in which we linked each session was to make each individual
think about that session and share something in the next session. You might want to go back
and remember what each session was about and what you learned from it. Remember the
prayer circle at the end of session two. It could also be another way of saying thank you.
Repentance
Here you have a chance to make a confession for your own failings and for those of the world
and those of the church. You might want to offer to God your negative attitudes and
judgment of other people's expression of their sexuality, or your excluding others because you
didn't understand or accept them. You might even want to offer to God aspects of your own
sexuality that you are not at peace with or that you have misused or even hurt others with. As
a group you might also repent for attitudes and sexual behaviour that society and the church
displays that are hurtful to others such as:
sexual abuse, rape, domestic violence, homophobia, sexualy exploiting others, and
making fun of the physical characteristics of others.
It is also important that you all know that through Jesus God's love is shown to us and that we
are healed and forgiven.
Another way you could do this exercise is to write down those areas in need of forgiveness
and then bum these pieces of paper in a bowl. By doing this you are symbolically destroying
these things in order that God may give new life. Here are some examples of sentences from
scripture that could remind you of Gods forgiveness and love:
►
“And God said let us make
(mention your own name) in our image, according to
our likeness. And God saw that he/she was good.”
Genesis 1:26, 31
►
“For God so loved
that God gave her/him the Christ”
John 3:16
God loved you with so muc
brought you to life with Christ.”
Ephesians 2:4
“I have come that you
may have life, and have it abundantly.
John 10:10
Readings
You might want to choose any of the readings from the sessions. A particularly fun way of
doing a reading might be for different members of the group to read different parts; the Song
of Song is one example of scripture that may be read in this way again.
Meditation or Sharing
The meditation that you did in session three could be used again or you could design your
5?
Session 9: Celebrating Sexuality
Page 3
own meditation about the scriptures and sexuality.
We recommend that you use part of this time for each of you to share something of what this
course has meant to you and how you are going to go forward with what you have learnt.
Prayer
This could take a multitude of forms.
►
if members of the group have talked about particular difficulties then you might pray
especially for them
►
if it is appropriate, married couples in the group might want to renew their mamage
vows; others may want to celebrate the relationships they are in
►
some might want to celebrate celibacy
►
the group might want to dedicate itself to a particular action, and this could be
committed to prayer
►
this might be an opportunity to pray for others outside the group who are suffering
Blessing
Here is a nice blessing from Chris Glaser :
Leader:
God has blessed and kept you;
God has made God's face to shine apon you, and has been gracious to you;
God has lifted up God's countenance upon you and given you peace
People:
Go with God's blessing. Go by God's grace. Go in God's peace. Alleluia!
Amen!
Music
You might well want you use music in you celebration. Here are some suggestions. Choose
a few songs that celebrate what it means to be able to be human and sensual and to share life
together. Try to avoid hymns that speak of God using sexist language — words that refer to
men and not to women. Here are a few songs to think about.
1.
Bind us together
Bind us together Lord, bind us together wiith cords that cannot he broken,hind us
together Lord, bind us together in love.
2
Kumhaya
Kumbayan my lord, kumhaya,
J,. (x2) O Lord kumbaya
Then add the words
Someone's singing Lord kumbaya; someone’s dancing/laughing/loving/praying etc.
3.
Word Made Flesh
(Sung to the tune of "Lights abode celestial Salem" No 431 in The English Hymnal)
Word made flesh! We see in Christ J esus
Sharing our humanity,
Loving, graceful, always truthful,
S’?
Session 9: Celebrating Sexuality
Close to others hodily,
Full of passion, full of healing
Touch of God to set them free.
Wonderful are these our bodies,
Flesh and blood to touch and see,
Place of pain and contradiction,
Yet of joy and ecstacy,
Place of passion, place of healing,
Touched by God who sets them free
O how glorious and resplendant,
Fragile body you shall he,
When endued with so much heauty,
Full of life, and strong and free,
Full of vigour, full of pleasure,
That shall last eternally.
Glory give to God the Lover,
Grateful hearts to the Beloved,
Blessed be the Love between th'em,
Overflowing to our good;
Praise and worship, praise and worship,
To the God whose Name is Love.
4.
Let All Mortal Flesh Keep Silence
(words adapted by Chris Glaser)
Let all mortal flesh show reverence
And in awe and wondrous delight
Ponder one horn from among us
To inspire and to invite
Reconciliation: Christ the Word of God
Spoken to redeem, reunite
Child of God, yet horn of M ary
That God's children all may he
One in faith and in haptism
One in hope and charity;
One in Christ's flesh, and one in Christ's ckurc:h
Off'ring our diversity
Alleluia! God comes among us
Blessing us with human hands
Loving us in earthly pleasures
Leading us to take our stands
Page 4
5?
Session 9: Celebrating Sexuality
For God's healing love in our broken world
For sweet justice in our land
5.
God of Our Hearts
(sung to the tune "Immortaljnvisible God only wise” words by Chris Glaser)
All loving, embracing, O God of our hearts
You hurt with us, laugh with us, teach us your arts;
Your sacred creation you give us to tend,
And then your own Body and Spirit you sen,d
Great giver of mercy and author of love,
Bless those who would follow your long suffering love:
The Lover you gave us we nailed to a tree,
But Love resurrected in your victory
Emblazoned in heavens, embodied in earth
God, bless those who love with repeated rebirth
Past brutal rejections to welcomes of love
And blessings from you, the descent of the dove
Page 5
ho
Evaluation: Session 1
1.
Were the instructions to the Facilitator clear
If no, how can they be improved?
Yes No
2.
Were the instructions to the Participants clear?
If no, how can they be improved?
Yes
No
or
detract?
Does the layout of the material
How?
4.
5.
■
assist
Was the language of the session
too sophisticated
too simple
OK
Was the content of the session
too sophisticated
too simple
OK
too long
too short
OK
1.
Was the session
9
What worked best about the session?
What was most difficult about the session?
4.
To test the emotional response of the participants to the material:
How did people respond to the material
►
with ease / receptively / openly
►
with a lot of reservation / with difficulty / closed
►
with some reservation / hesitantly
►
Or any other - specify
(How many)
5.
Sexual orientation: was there any particular response from people based on their sexual
orientation? Please explain.
6.
Any other comments that emerge specifically from this session?
(Please write on back if necessary)
61
Facilitator’s Guide
Evaluation: Session 2
Introduce your group to us.
Now that the group has settled please tell us about its nature and composition:
1.
Age range
2.
Racial composition
3.
Gender
4.
Clergy-laity
5.
Educational background
6.
Class background
7.
Number in group
8.
Belong to same congregation
9.
If not, what is the common denominator?
10.
How many facilitators
11.
If there is anything else that will help us in interpreting you evaluations of the group and
the group’s own evaluations please tell us here.
Evaluation: Session 2
1.
Were the instructions to the Facilitator clear
If no, how can they be improved?
Yes No
2.
Were the instructions to the Participants clear?
If no, how can they be improved?
Yes
No
3.
Does the layout of the material
How?
or
detract?
4.
Was the language of the session
too sophisticated
too simple
OK
5.
Was the content of the session
too sophisticated
too simple
OK
11.
Was the session
too long
too short
OK
12.
What worked best about the session?
13.
What was most difficult about the session?
14.
To test the emotional response of the participants to the material:
How did people respond to the material
►
with ease / receptively / openly
►
with a lot of reservation / with difficulty / closed
►
with some reservation / hesitantly
►
Or any other - specify
assist
(How many)
15.
Sexual orientation: was there any particular response from people based on their sexual
orientation? Please explain.
16.
Any other comments that emerge specifically from this session?
(Please write on back if necessary)
EvalBati«m^ion3
5.
Were the instructions to the Facilitator clear
If no, how can they be improved?
Yes No
6.
Were the instructions to the Participants clear?
If no, how can they be improved?
Yes
No
7.
Does the layout of the material
How?
or
detract?
8.
Was the language of the session
too sophisticated
too simple
OK
9.
Was the content of the session
too sophisticated
too simple
OK
7.
Was the session
too long
too short
OK
8.
What worked best about the session?
9.
What was most difficult about the session?
10.
To test the emotional response of the participants to the material:
How did people respond to the material
►
with ease / receptively / openly
►
with a lot of reservation / with difficulty / closed
►
with some reservation / hesitantly
►
Or any other - specify
assist
(How many)
11.
Sexual orientation: was there any particular response from people based on their sexual
orientation? Please explain.
12.
Any other comments that emerge specifically from this session?
(Please write on back if necessary)
Gy-
Evaluation: Session 4
5.
Were the instructions to the Facilitator clear
If no, how can they be improved?
Yes
No
6.
Were the instructions to the Participants clear?
If no, how can they be improved?
Yes
No
7.
Does the layout of the material
How?
or
detract?
8.
Was the language of the session
too sophisticated
too simple
OK
9.
Was the content of the session
too sophisticated
too simple
OK
13.
Was the session
too long
too short
OK
14.
What worked best about the session?
15.
What was most difficult about the session?
16.
To test the emotional response of the participants to the material:
How did people respond to the material
►
with ease / receptively / openly
►
with a lot of reservation / with difficulty / closed
►
with some reservation / hesitantly
►
Or any other - specify
assist
(How many)
17.
Sexual orientation: was there any particular response from people based on their sexual
orientation? Please explain.
18.
Any other comments that emerge specifically from this session?
(Please write on back if necessary)
65
Evaluation: Session 5
5.
Were the instructions to the Facilitator clear
If no, how can they be improved?
Yes No
6.
Were the instructions to the Participants clear?
If no, how can they be improved?
Yes
No
7.
Does the layout of the material
How?
or
detract?
8.
Was the language of the session
too sophisticated
too simple
OK
9.
Was the content of the session
too sophisticated
too simple
OK
19.
Was the session
too long
too short
OK
20.
What worked best about the session?
21.
What was most difficult about the session?
22.
To test the emotional response of the participants to the material:
How did people respond to the material
►
with ease / receptively / openly
►
with a lot of reservation / with difficulty / closed
►
with some reservation / hesitantly
►
Or any other - specify
assist
(How many)
23.
Sexual orientation: was there any particular response from people based on their sexual
orientation? Please explain.
24.
Any other comments that emerge specifically from this session?
(Please write on back if necessary)
66
.. . . -
; a EvaIuati<0>mSes$ion 6
5.
Were the instructions to the Facilitator clear
If no, how can they be improved?
Yes No
6.
Were the instructions to the Participants clear?
If no, how can they be improved?
Yes
No
7.
Does the layout of the material
How?
or
detract?
8.
Was the language of the session
too sophisticated
too simple
OK
9.
Was the content of the session
too sophisticated
too simple
OK
25.
Was the session
too long
too short
OK
26.
What worked best about the session?
27.
What was most difficult about the session?
28.
To test the emotional response of the participants to the material:
How did people respond to the material
►
with ease / receptively / openly
►
with a lot of reservation / with difficulty / closed
►
with some reservation / hesitantly
►
Or any other - specify
assist
(How many)
29.
Sexual orientation: was there any particular response from people based on their sexual
orientation? Please explain.
30.
Any other comments that emerge specifically from this session?
(Please write on back if necessary)
67
Evaluation: Session 7
5.
Were the instructions to the Facilitator clear
If no, how can they be improved?
Yes
No
6.
Were the instructions to the Participants clear?
If no, how can they be improved?
Yes
No
7.
Does the layout of the material
How?
or
detract?
8.
Was the language of the session
too sophisticated
too simple
OK
9.
* Was the content of the session
too sophisticated
too simple
OK
too long
too short
OK
assist
31.
Was the session
32.
What worked best about the session?
33.
What was most difficult about the session?
34.
To test the emotional response of the participants to the material:
How did people respond to the material
►
with ease / receptively / openly
►
with a lot of reservation / with difficulty / closed
►
with some reservation / hesitantly
►
Or any other - specify
(How many)
35.
Sexual orientation: was there any particular response from people based on their sexual
orientation? Please explain.
36.
Any other comments that emerge specifically from this session?
(Please write on back if necessary)
63
Evaluation: Session &
5.
Were the instructions to the Facilitator clear
If no, how can they be improved?
Yes
No
6.
Were the instructions to the Participants clear?
If no, how can they be improved?
Yes
No
7.
Does the layout of the material
How?
or
detract?
8.
Was the language of the session
too sophisticated
too simple
OK
9.
Was the content of the session
too sophisticated
too simple
OK
37.
Was the session
too long
too short
OK
38.
What worked best about the session?
39.
What was most difficult about the session?
40.
To test the emotional response of the participants to the material:
How did people respond to the material
►
with ease / receptively / openly
►
with a lot of reservation / with difficulty / closed
►
with some reservation / hesitantly
►
Or any other - specify
assist
(How many)
41.
Sexual orientation: was there any particular response from people based on their sexual
orientation? Please explain.
42.
Any other comments that emerge specifically from this session?
(Please write on back if necessary)
Facilitator’s Guide
Evaluation: Session 9
1.
Were the instructions to the Facilitator clear
If no, how can they be improved?
Yes No
2.
Were the instructions to the Participants clear?
If no, how can they be improved?
Yes
No
3.
Does the layout of the material
How?
or
detract?
4.
Was the language of the session
too sophisticated
too simple
OK
5.
Was the content of the session
too sophisticated
too simple
OK
1.
Was the session
too long
too short
OK
2.
What worked best about the session?
3.
What was most difficult about the session?
4.
To test the emotional response of the participants to the material:
How did people respond to the material
►
with ease / receptively / openly
►
with a lot of reservation / with difficulty / closed
►
with some reservation / hesitantly
►
Or any other - specify
assist
(How many)
5.
Sexual orientation: was there any particular response from people based on their sexual
orientation? Please explain.
6.
Any other comments that emerge specifically from this session?
(Please write on back if necessary)
Facilitator’s Overall Evaluation of the Course
1.
To what extent did the course meet you expectations?
2.
To what extent do you think did the course meet the expectations of the group?
3.
Describe the mood of the group at the last session.
4.
Do you think that overall participants were able to be honest and deal with real issues in
their lives?
If people did face difficult issues in their own lives how was this generally handled by the
group, by yourself?
6.
Do you think that people changed because of the course? Tell us in which ways.
7.
If you were now to sit down and write this course over again what would you change in:
the content
the presentation
8.
What was the most helpful/best thing about the course?
9.
What was the lest helpful thing about the course?
Position: 710 (6 views)